Archivi categoria: divertimento

Mass Effect 2: orrori grammaticali

Recentemente ho completato Mass Effect 2 come ricognitore, e forse mi concederò un secondo giro come adepto; non ho potuto fare a meno di notare degli errori grammaticali nella traduzione italiana (e questi sono solo gli ultimi due che ho deciso di fotografare – lì per lì non mi è venuto in mente di usare il tasto Stamp), assieme ad un numerosissimo insieme di frasi tradotte in modo poco scorrevole, ed espressioni senza senso.

Questa è l’ultima volta che attivo le voci italiane in un gioco multilingua, da purista che sono quella era l’unica mancanza che mi concedevo, ma puntualmente le traduzioni sono fallimentari. D’ora in poi, solo lingua originale anche nei giochi.

Ecco le testimonianze:

mass effect 2 errori grammaticali
"ha sparato HA delle persone"
mass effect 2 errori grammaticali
"sonde addiZZionali"

  This article has been Digiproved

Costruisci la tua cicloradio™ per ascoltare la musica sulla bici senza le batterie!

Nota del 2008: dopo diversi anni, con i lettori mp3 che vi vengono tirati dietro a pochi euro, la guida è superflua… a meno che non vogliate provare l’ebbrezza di costruire qualcosa di “innovativo”.

Mi è venuta questa idea durante le vacanze estive di qualche tempo fa, quando ero VERAMENTE annoiato. Tutto questo accrocco è stato smontato dalla mia bici ormai da più di un anno, perché, se è una meraviglia andarci a passeggio per le vie del paese, o farci scampagnate su strade non troppo dissestate, è anche vero che andarci sparati in discesa oppure su percorsi sterrati lo rende piuttosto vulnerabile .

Comunque, se non avete nulla di meglio da fare, e siete stati contagiati dalla sindrome di MacGiver, allora date un’occhiata a queta guida e magari vi divertirete un pò.

Trovate una dinamo, usata, nuova, rubata dalla bici vecchia di 20 anni che ha il vostro vicino di casa, purché cerchiate di trovarla da 6V, almeno sarete sicuri che ci sia una riserva in potenza sufficiente.

Hey, are you sure it is 6V?
Questo è il premio della caccia al tesoro…. Pssssssst non c’è nessuno, sbrigati col cacciavite!

 

Ora dovete scegliere un posto stabile per montare la suddetta dinamo al telaio della vostra bici. Io ho usato la staffa posteriore dove normalmente si avvita la lampadina rossa. Basta di solito un bullone per fissarci la dinamo; nel mio caso ho avuto bisogno anche di una certa quantità di fil di ferro per assicurarmi che la parte rotante fosse sempre e comunque a contatto con il copertone. Preparatevi ad ogni modo ad usare la forza bruta per piegare il braccio della dinamo e fare in modo che la testa della stessa sia nella gista posizione per toccare la parte zigrinata della gomma. Fate in modo che il contatto della testa con il copertone sia "deciso", né troppo leggero, perché facilemente la dinamo vibrerebbe e perderebbe contatto con la gomma, né troppo aderente, per evitare che l’attrito sia eccessivo e si consumi il pneumatico. Insomma, fate delle prove con la bici a testa in giù, e vedete se girando velocemente in pedali al rapporto più alto la dinamo rimane (quasi) sempre a contatto con la ruota senza vibrare troppo frequentemente.

 

Ora che avete la sorgente di energia elettrica, vi serve tutto l’occorrente per "raddrizzare" l’uscita alternata della dinamo (a meno che non ne abbiate trovata una che dà già corrente continua in uscita, ma non ne ho mai viste). Quindi procuratevi i seguenti componenti elettronici (che potete comprare, ma perché farlo se smontando una radio o un vecchio televisore ne avete in abbondanza)

 

4 diodi:

Anyone of'em is ok. If you know how to use them :-P
Un diodo viene raffigurato come –>|– dove la punta della freccia rappresenta il "polo positivo". Il lato del diodo con l’anello nero o colorato è il polo positivo.

 

1 condensatore (o capacitore):

Do not pull those wires!
Questi sono due comuni esempi di condensatore. Meglio se trovate un condensatore con una capacità di qualche Volt superiore all’uscita della dinamo, come quelli comunissimi da 16V. La capacità dovrà essere piuttosto alta, almeno 2000uF, o la riproduzione del walkman, specialmente durante le corse veloci, sarà fastidiosamente disturbata da un forte ronzio di fondo.

 

batterie ricaricabili: servono come riserva di carica per quando ad esempio vi fermate ad un semforo o quando state procedendo in salita a velocità artropodica e l’energia prodotta non sarebbe sufficiente a far funzionare la riproduzione, ma soprattutto per assorbire gli eccessi di energia in occasione di corse veloci in piano oppure in discesa. Infatti il mio walkman, senza alcuna batteria inserita in parallelo, semplicemente smetteva di funzionare se la corrente in uscita dalla dinamo era troppo elevata, e cioè se le ruote giravano troppo velocemente. Ovviamente dovrà trattarsi di batterie di voltaggio simile all’uscita della dinamo. Io per esempio ho usato delle vecchie batterie ricaricabili di un vecchio aspirapolvere portatile che aveva rottamato mia nonna; vecchissime e assolutamente inefficienti per tenere la carica a lungo, ma non è questo che vi serve. Non ponete limiti alla fantasia, magari le batterie dei vecchi cellulari del babbo e della mamma vanno bene, se le collegate in parallelo per avere una tensione pari alla somma delle relative differenze di potenziale.

saldatore (solo se volete fare un lavoro "pulito"; io in realtà non l’ho usato)

 

E questo è lo schema che dovrete seguire:

Admire the artistic talent...
Non strabuzzate gli occhi e cercate di raccapezzarvi. Non pensavate veramente che una guida del genere potesse essere compresa anche da chi non ha la minima concezione di elettronica? Fate bene attenzione a tutte le polarità rapprensentate in figura, vanno assolutamente rispettate.

Un buon punto per piazzare il raddrizzatore, cioè diodi più condensatore (che avrete opportunamente avvolto in più giri di nastro isolante per eviare che ci finiscano polvere e schizzi) è presso il punto di convergenza dei tubi orizzontale e obliquo anteriore del telaio, mentre le batterie trovano un comodo alloggiamento sotto il tubo orizzontale del telaio, come rappresentato in figura:

Don't ever try this at home kids!
Posizionate il raddrizzatore impacchettato nel punto marcato col cerchio giallo. Posizionate invece le batterie in corrispondenza del cerchio verde.

Avete in posizione sia la dinamo che le batterie e il raddrizzatore, non rimane che collegarli. Dato che la dinamo ha un’uscita a corrente alternata, collegate un suo polo con un polo d’entrata del raddrizzatore, e l’altro con l’altro polo del raddrizzatore (ah, se non lo sapeste il secondo polo della dinamo è il suo stesso telaietto, per cui va bene legare un filo conduttore al braccio metallico che avete bullonato al telaio).

Su, manca poco!

Collegate il polo positivo delle batterie al polo positivo dell’alloggiamento delle pile del walkman, stesso discorso per i poli negativi. Dovreste aprire il walkman per tirar fuori i cavetti collegati alle placchette metalliche, ma l’importante è avere un contatto stabile. Se siete ipertecnologici potete usare l’ingresso a jack per l’alimentazione esterna. Magari, visto che dovrete maltrattare il walkman, usatene uno vecchio.

Io ho montato il walkman sul centro del manubrio, inserito in un astuccio impermeabile di plastica trasparente, a sua volta fissato con del nastro per pacchi al telaio, e con una tavoletta di compensato tra l’astuccio ed il manubrio che dava un appoggio in piano.

Purtroppo, anche se ora ho una webcam con cui poter fare foto di tutto l’occorrente, ho già smontato il walkman dalla bici… ma confido nella vostra abilità manuale.

Script di mIRC completo per la gestione dei suoni di sistema

Questo script fa tutto il lavoraccio di gestire gli eventi che in mIRC sono programmati per generare dei suoni. Li intercetta, e, se avete attivato i suoni, suonerà il WAV che avete scelto (nello ZIP ci sono anche i WAV che uso io).

Se volete scaricare lo ZIP, eccolo qui. Tutte le istruzioni per avviarlo sono include nel file TXT, mentre qui potete vedere come personalizzarlo, e sapere come funziona. I WAV sono stati fatti perlopiù con MS Talkit, che potete trovare nella sezione Downloads/AudioVideo, nel caso vogliate farne degli altri voi stessi; ho incluso le istruzioni per creare file WAV con Talkit nel menù inglese (attivate il menu inglese e cercate nella sezione HowTo’s.

Segue il listato dello script:

alias sounds {
  //if ($1 == on) { /set %Soundon 1 | echo -a  $+ $color(info text).dd $+ *** Sounds have been activated }
  //if ($1 == off) { /set %soundon 0 | echo -a  $+ $color(info text).dd $+ *** Sounds have been disabled }
}

alias checkquery //if (($query($1).addr != $null) && (%Soundon == 1)) /splay query.wav

CTCP *:DCC:*:{
  if (($2 == send) && (%soundon == 1)) /splay dcc send.wav
}

on *:GETFAIL:*.*:{
  //if (%Soundon == 1) /splay dcc failed.wav
}

on *:FILERCVD:*.*:{
  //if (%Soundon == 1) /splay dcc finished.wav
}


on 1:OPEN:?:*:{
  //if (($pos($strip($1-),Matches for,1) == 1) && (%Soundon == 1)) /splay locator.wav
  else /timer 1 1 checkquery $nick
}

on *:NOTICE:*:*:{
  //if ((($pos($strip($1-),Requested File's on its way! Low CPS Limit:,1) != $null) || ($pos($strip($1-),is on its way.,1) != $null)  || ($pos($strip($1-),Now Sending!,1) != $null)) && (%Soundon == 1)) { /splay File Arriving.wav | goto bother }

  //if ((($pos($strip($1-),is on its way.,1) != $null) || ($pos($strip($1-),Now Sending!,1) != $null)) && (%Soundon == 1)) { /splay File Arriving.wav | goto bother }

  //if ((($pos($strip($1-),You are in que now with number,1) != $null) || (($pos($strip($1-),I have added,1) != $null) && ($pos($strip($1-),in my que,1) != $null)) && (%Soundon == 1))) { /splay Queued.wav | goto bother }

  //if ((($pos($strip($1-),You are already in my que list with,1) != $null) || ($pos($strip($1-),Sorry I am totally maxed out even in que list,1) != $null)) && (%Soundon == 1)) { /splay Queue Finished.wav | goto bother }

  //if ((($pos($strip($1-),Password accepted for,1) != $null) && ($nick == NickServ)) && (%Soundon == 1)) { /splay Identified.wav | goto bother }

  //if ($pos($1-,server flood protection activated,1) != $null) goto bother
  //if ($pos($1-,has opped,1) != $null) goto bother
  //if ($pos($1-,has deopped,1) != $null) goto bother
  //if ($poscs($1-,DCC Send,1) != $null) goto bother

  //if (%Soundon == 1) /splay notice.wav

  :bother
}

on *:TEXT:*:#:{
  //if ($pos($1-,$me,1) != $null) {//if (%Soundon == 1) /splay chimes.wav//if ($window(@calls,1) == $null) /window -n @calls//aline -hp @calls 11 $chan 9 [ $time ] 7 < $nick > 8 $1-
  }
}

on *:CONNECT://if (%Soundon == 1) /splay Connected.wav

on *:DISCONNECT://if (%Soundon == 1) splay Disconnected.wav

E segue anche la spiegazione.

I primi tre eventi (CTCP, on FILERCVD, on GETFAIL) si attivano rispettivamente quando un file arriva per DCC, quando il trasferimento viene completato, e quando si interrompe.

Il trigger on OPEN si avvia quando si apre una finestra di query. Prima controlla che non si tratti del risultato di ricerca di uno script per condivisione MP3, e se no, fa partire il suono dopo 1 secondo; questo succede per dare tempo al mio script antispam (controllate nella sezione IRC per scaricare anche quello) di chiudere la finestra se si tratta di spam.

L’evento on NOTICE controlla molte cose. Se NickServ ha ricevuto la vostra password, se la vostra richiesta di un MP3 è stata accodata o se sta per essere inviata (compatibile solo con SpR e SDFind), ignora molti messaggi inutili come op, deop, flood protection, e se nessun dei casi precedenti è verificato, avvia un suono generico di "notice".

L’ultimo, on TEXT, fa quello che mi piace di più: controlla se qualcuno scrive il vostro nick nel canale, e avvia il suono chimes.wav, mettendo in una finestra a parte la riga incriminata per permettervi di leggerla più tardi. Due cose: primo, potreste volerlo disabilitare per ragioni specifiche (esempio, siete un op, date il voice a qualcuno, ed il suo stupidissimo script vi ringrazia in automatico – questo sì che è inutile!!) e allora o staccate il suono del tutto (cancellando la linea che contiene "chimes.wav") o aggiungete qualche filtro per quelle evenienze (ma dovete essere un pò pratici di scripting); secondo, il log nella finestra separata per me è molto utile, ma se a voi non piace, potete rimuoverlo cancellando le due righe che contengono "@calls". Considerazione finale, questa parte può essere "inefficiente", nel senso che controlla tutto quello che viene scritto in tutti i canali, e occupa la CPU (poco, comunque). Io ho un singolo, grande on TEXT che controlla molte cose, ma se voi avete già altri script installati, aggiungere questo vi farebbe usare ancora più CPU.

 

Ora, come usarlo? Semplice, dopo averlo caricato cone le istruzioni presenti nel TXT, scrivete il comando /sounds on per inizializzarlo, e sarà pronto a suonare i WAV. Volete vedere un film o giocare? Scrivete il comando /sounds off e mIRC non vi disturberà.

How to cutomize it? Basically, you can change the name ot location of the WAVs, delete some parts you’re not interested in, but mostly, add other handlers, if you can, and care. Only thing: mIRC will continue to beep if someone writes other lines in a query after the first one, even if sounds are off. I could change that, but I was too lazy in that moment; I don’t even plan to do it in the future… taje it as a good excercise on scripting .
Come personalizzarlo? Fondamentalmente, potete cambiare il nome o la posizione dei WAV, concellare qulce parte in cui non siete interessati, ma principalmente, aggiungendo altri controlli, se ne siete capaci. L’unica pecca è che mIRC continuerà a fare BIP se ci sono messaggi in una query dopo la prima riga, anche se i suoni sono stati disattivati. Potrei correggerlo, ma non ne ho voglia.

Collezione di disegni ASCII art

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  A T T A C K !                                   ~~~~~~~




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Bee and Rose

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    (/|\)                                                           (/|\)
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      |          \__/     \__/\/\/                                    |
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      |                                                               |
    (\o/)___________________________________________________________(\o/)
    (/|\)                                                           (/|\)


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  __|/__   ( \|(__   __(__    __|/__
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-=[ rose & heart ]=-

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      6OuU  /p u gcoUodpP  CgggbU8OU 6UUodoUOdcb  oOO0896%68Oo        o
        \\\//  /douUP          6OuU999\`gcoUodpP  CDaVID0oi%8B       dOo
          \\\////                \\\  /douUP      `UPQ%OO8OO'       oC8Po
           |||/\                   ||||           ,d8OUC%CBO%b     C8UvCO
           |||\/                   ||||           `O89YeU8OOP       c\|88b
           |||||                   ||||              q|||p            ||/
     .....//||||\....        ...../||||\....       ...|||..           ||



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  dOB*9*O8P*UOpugO9*D                                    dOB9GO8P4UOpugO9GD
  CO*9O0*89PBCOPL*SOBB*           =-/                    CG9O039PBCOPL8SOBB9
   Cgg*bU8*UO*OOd*UOdcb  \|/        \\ /                  CgGbU3UOBOOd6UOdcb
     6O*U  /p  gc*U*dpP   \ |  //_  //-<_                  6OGU  /p  c8U8dpP
       \\\//  /d*uUP*    =--\\\// \|//-=                     \\\//  /dGuUP
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          |||||                ||||            || |             |||||
    .....//||||\....     .....//|||\....  ..../||||\....  .....//||||\....




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                          (_~~   ~~___)\_/ |   "Velociraptor"
                          (_~~   ~~___)\_/ |
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                                  c==o
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               - ---|__|  _^(_) /^   __\____ _   _|
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              -  -- |__| . _(_) \v     /__________|________
                 ---l__l_ (_). []|+-+-<\^   L  . _   - ---L|
           _ ________\__\    __. ||^l  \Y] /_]  (_) .  _,--'
                       \~_]  L_| || .\ .\\/~.    _,--'"
                        \_\ . __/||  |\  \`-+-<'"         "Millenium Falcon"
                          "`---._|J__L|X o~~|[\\
                                 \____/ \___|[//
                                  `--'   `--+-'



                         ________
                    _,.-Y  |  |  Y-._
                .-~"   ||  |  |  |   "-.
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              [L______L_[________]______j~  '-=c_]/=-^
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                    |..|         |..|
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                    [_L]         [_L]
                   /|..|\       /|..|\
                  `=}--{='     `=}--{='
                 .-^--r-^-.   .-^--r-^-.            "Imperial AT-AT"
           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



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                     [_7      _  // /
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                      [ ][.-~" ~"-.]          "Imperial AT-ST"
              ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



              ___  _____
            .'/,-Y"     "~-.
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            /\               _\_      "Doh!"
           i            ___/"   "\
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           l         ]     o !__./
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                 \   l  /-----~~" /
                  Y   \          /
                  |    "x______.^    "Homer"
                  |           \
                  j            Y




                                                         ____
             ___                                      .-~. /_"-._
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                \  \                                / : \~x.  ` ')
                 ]  Y                              /  |  Y< ~-.__j
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                          ~~     (   _}
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           "T-Rex"                /,`--'~\--'~\
                        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


  ------------------------------------------------------------------
                         The Koala Bear Collection
  ------------------------------------------------------------------
     ___           ___           ___           ___           ___
   {~._.~}       {~:_:~}       {~...~}       {~+_+~}       {~___~}
    ( Y )         ( Y )         ( Y )         ( Y )         ( Y )
   ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()
   (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)

    Koala         Koala         Koala         Dead          Sleeping
                  saying        saying        koala         koala
                   yes           no

     ___           ___           ___           ___           ___
   {~-_-~}       {~p_q~}       {~o o~}       {~._.~}       {~._.~}
    ( Y )         ( Y )         ( . )         ( Y )         ( Y )
   ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()v-v()
   (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)Y(_)       (_)^(_)

    Asian         A very        Surprised     Male          Female
    koala         tired         koala         koala         koala
                  koala

     ___           ___         _ ___ _         ___           ___
   {~._.~}       {~===~}       \~._.~/       {~x_x~}       {~. .~}
   _( Y )_        ( Y )         ( Y )         ( Y )         ( V )
  (:_~*~_:)      ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()       ()~*~()
   (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)

   Hugging       Geordi        Spock         Pissed        Pinocchio
    koala         koala         koala         koala         koala

                                                *
     ___           ___          _   _          /_\           ___
   {~._.~}       {~._.~}       ( )-( )       {~._.~}       {~._.~}
    ( Y )         ( Y )        ()_*_()        ( Y )         ( Y )
    j~*~l        ()~*~()        ( v )        ()~*~()         ~H~
   (_)-(_)        l_T_|        {_` '_}       (_)-(_)          H
                                 ~~~                          ~
   'armless      Standing      Upside        Party         Koala
    koala         koala         down          koala         icecream
                                koala
            .             .
     ___   //     .---.  //      _ _                         ___
   {~._.~}//     Y|o o|Y//     {~.V.~}         . .         {~._.~}
    ( Y )K/     /_(i=i)K/       ( Y )                       ( Y )
   ()~*~()      ~()~*~()~      ()~*~()                     ()~S~()
   (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)       (_)-(_)                    /(_)-(_)\
                                                          ~       ~
   Luke          Darth         Koala with    Invisible     Superman
   Skywalker     Vader         a splitting   koala         koala
   koala         koala         headache


   _)   ___   (_     \___/          |||          _) (_          -^-
  _) \{~._.~}/ (_   {~._.~}       {~. .~}       {~$_$~}      {~ -_- ~}
  )_\ \( Y )/ /_(    ( Y )         (v^v)         ( Y )        (  Y  )
   )_ ()~*~() _(    ()~*~()       / ' ' \       ()~*~()      ()~___~()
    )_(_)-(_)_(     (_)-(_)      / \   / \      (_)-(_)     (_)__V__(_)

      Dragon        Berlin        Dracula       Dagobert      Sumo
      koala         koala         koala         koala         koala
                    _____|           _           _____          ___
        ___         \_*_/|         _/ \_          |_|*        {~._.~}
      {'   `}      {~._.~}        {~._.~}/      {~._.~}        ( Y )
       (   )        ( Y )|         ( Y )/        ( Y )        ()`o'()
      (/   \)      ()***()        (  : /)       ()~*~U)       (_)_(_)
      (__u__)      (_)-(_)       (   :   )      (_)-(_)    ___|  1  |___
                                                          | 2         3 |

      koala         Russian       Snow          PhD           Champion
      from behind   koala         koala         koala         koala
                                    ___
        ___  ___  ___        xxxxx _) (_         ___           ()_()
      {~._.{~._.~}._.~}     //._.\{~._.~}      {~._.~}          ._.
       ( O )( O )( O )      /( Y )\( Y )      ~ ( Y ) ~~       ( Y )
      ()~*~()~*~()~*~()     (/   \()\V/()    ~o~ ~  ~~o~      () O ()
      (_)-((_)-(_))-(_)     /     \_)-(_)    ~  ~  ~  ~ ~     (_)-(_)
                            ~~~~~~~            ~  ~   ~
      koala                 Just married        Swimming      Easter
      chorus                koalas              koala         koala

  ------------------------------------------------------------------




                             _-_      _-_
                            //^\\__._//^\\___.
                           /\\__\\/_//__/'__/|
       .-----------.     ./---->>/O/\--'---/||
       : For: You   `._,'/ * // / / || *  /|||
       : Luv, Pooky ,'  /_-_-'_/_/__\\___/.|||
       `-----------'   |*//*  *| | * \\  | |||
                       | 'o  o | |  o 'o |.|||
                       | *  *  | |*  *  *| |||
                       |  o  o | |  o  o |.|||
                       |*  *  *| | *  *  | ||/
                       |  o  o | |  o  o |.|/
                       | *  *  | |*  *  *| /
                       |_______|_|_______|/
                                             

                   /  \      .--.
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                  '-.____.'
 

        _--_     _--_     _--_     _--_     _--_     _--_         
       (    )~~~(    )   (    )~~~(    )   (    )~~~(    )        
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         (  ' _ `  )       (  ' _ `  )       (  ' _ `  )          
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       /         \___     /        _>\    /   /          ._/   __ 
      /   /       !  \   /  /-___-'   ) /'   /.-----\___/     /  )
     (   <        !__/ /'  (        _/  \___//          `----'   ! 
      \   \      /\    \___/`------' )       \            ______/ 
       \--/   \ /  \  ._    \      `<         `--_____----'       
         `.    )-   \/  ) ___>-_     \   /-\    \    /            
          !   !  `.    / /      `-_   `-/  /    !   !             
          /  /__   \__/ (  \---__/ `-_    /     /  /__            
         (______)        \__)         `-_/     (______)           


 \|/  \|/  \\||//  \|/   \\\||/   \||///    \\||//   \\\\\|||/// \|/|\|

====================================================================

                       THE TEDDY BEARS PICNIC

====================================================================


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                   ,8888888888b "8, Yba888888888888888adP ,8" d8888888888,
                   dP        `Yb,`Y8P""'             `""Y8P',dP'        Yb
                  ,88888888888P"Y8P'_.---.._     _..---._`Y8P"Y88888888888,
                  dP         d'  8 '  ____  `. .'  ____  ` 8  `b         Yb
                 ,888888888888   8   <(@@)>  | |  <(@@)>   8   888888888888,
                 dP          8   8    `"""         """'    8   8          Yb
                ,8888888888888,  8          ,   ,          8  ,8888888888888,
                dP           `b  8,        (.-_-.)        ,8  d'           Yb
               ,88888888888888Yaa8b      ,'       `,      d8aaP88888888888888,
               dP               ""8b     _,gd888bg,_     d8""               Yb
              ,888888888888888888888b,    ""Y888P""    ,d888888888888888888888,
              dP                   "8"b,             ,d"8"                   Yb
             ,888888888888888888888888,"Ya,_,ggg,_,aP",888888888888888888888888,
             dP                      "8,  "8"\x/"8"  ,8"                      Yb
            ,88888888888888888888888888b   8\\x//8   d88888888888888888888888888,
            8888bgg,_                  8   8\\x//8   8                  _,ggd8888
             `"Yb, ""8888888888888888888   Y\\x//P   8888888888888888888"" ,dP"'
               _d8bg,_"8,              8   `b\x/d'   8              ,8"_,gd8b_
             ,iP"   "Yb,8888888888888888    8\x/8    8888888888888888,dP"  `"Yi,
            ,P"    __,888              8    8\x/8    8              888,__    "Y,
           ,8baaad8P"":Y8888888888888888 aaa8\x/8aaa 8888888888888888P:""Y8baaad8,
           dP"':::::::::8              8 8::8\x/8::8 8              8:::::::::`"Yb
           8::::::::::::8888888888888888 8::88888::8 8888888888888888::::::::::::8
           8::::::::::::8,             8 8:::::::::8 8             ,8::::::::::::8
           8::::::::::::8888888888888888 8:::::::::8 8888888888888888::::::::::::8
           8::::::::::::Ya             8 8:::::::::8 8             aP::::::::::::8
           8:::::::::::::888888888888888 8:::::::::8 888888888888888:::::::::::::8
           8:::::::::::::Ya            8 8:::::::::8 8            aP:::::::::::::8
           Ya:::::::::::::88888888888888 8:::::::::8 88888888888888:::::::::::::aP
           `8;:::::::::::::Ya,         8 8:::::::::8 8         ,aP:::::::::::::;8'
            Ya:::::::::::::::"Y888888888 8:::::::::8 888888888P":::::::::::::::aP
            `8;::::::::::::::::::::""""Y8888888888888P""""::::::::::::::::::::;8'
             Ya:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::aP
              "b;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Normand  ::::::;d"
               `Ya;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Veilleux ::::;aP'
                 `Ya;:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;aP'
                    "Ya;:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;aP"
                       "Yba;;;:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;;;adP"
                           `"""""""Y888888888888888888888P"""""""'     "Tutankhamun"


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                       ,ad8888888888888888888888ba,
                    ,a888888888888888888888888888888a,
                  a888888888888888888888888888888888888a
                a888888888888P"    "8,       `Y8888888888a
               d888888888888'       )8,       `88888888888b
              d888888888888'       ,888,        ,8888888888b
             d888888888888'       ,88888a      ,888888888888b
            I88888888888888ba,   ,88888P'     ,88888888888888I
           ,888888888"""""""Y88ba88888888888888P' `Y8888888888,
           I888888888P       Y88888888888888P"'    `Y888888888I
           888888888P         `8888888888888b       `Y888888888
           88888888P        ,d888888888888888b       )888888888
           I88888888b      ,d88888888888888888b     ,d88888888I
           `888888888b    ,d888888888888P 88888baaad8888888888'
            I888888888b  ,8'        888P           d888888888I
             Y888888888b,8'         88P           d888888888P
              Y88888888888          88b          d888888888P
               Y8888888888b,        888b        d888888888P
                "88888888888888888888888b 888888888888888"
                  "888888888888888888888888888888888888"
                    `"888888888888888888888888888888"'
                       `"Y8888888888888888888888P"'
                           ``""YY88888888PP""''       "Recycle"



                                              8
                                              8
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                             .,ad88888P:a8P:d888b:Y8a:Y88888ba,.
                         ,ad888888P:a8888:a8888888a:8888a:Y888888ba,
                      ,a8888888:d8888888:d888888888b:8888888b:8888888a,
                   ,a88888888:d88888888:d88888888888b:88888888b:88888888a,
                 ,d88888888:d888888888:d8888888888888b:888888888b:88888888b,
               ,d88888888:d8888888888I:888888888888888:I8888888888b:88888888b,
             ,d888888888:d88888888888:88888888888888888:88888888888b:888888888b,
            d8888888888:I888888888888:88888888888888888:888888888888I:8888888888b
           d8P"'   `"Y8:8P"'     `"Y8:8P"'    8    `"Y8:8P"'     `"Y8:8P"'   `"Y8b
           "           "             "        8        "             "           "
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                                             888      __
                                             Y88b,,,d88P
                                             `Y8888888P'      "Umbrella"
                                               `"""""'


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                                     ,d888888888b,
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                                   d888888888888888)                     ,d888888888b,
                                   I8888888888888888 _________          ,8888888888888b
                         __________`Y88888888888888P"""""""""""baaa,__ ,888888888888888,
                     ,adP"""""""""""9888888888P""^                 ^""Y8888888888888888I
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             ,d88'           d88888P'                                          "b,
            ,d88'           d888888'                                            `b,
           ,d88'           d888888I                                              `b,
           d88I           ,8888888'            ___                                `b,
          ,888'           d8888888          ,d88888b,              ____            `b,
          d888           ,8888888I         d88888888b,           ,d8888b,           `b
         ,8888           I8888888I        d8888888888I          ,88888888b           8,
         I8888           88888888b       d88888888888'          8888888888b          8I
         d8886           888888888       Y888888888P'           Y8888888888,        ,8b
         88888b          I88888888b      `Y8888888^             `Y888888888I        d88,
         Y88888b         `888888888b,      `""""^                `Y8888888P'       d888I
         `888888b         88888888888b,                           `Y8888P^        d88888
          Y888888b       ,8888888888888ba,_          _______        `""^        ,d888888
          I8888888b,    ,888888888888888888ba,_     d88888888b               ,ad8888888I
          `888888888b,  I8888888888888888888888b,    ^"Y888P"^      ____.,ad88888888888I
           88888888888b,`888888888888888888888888b,     ""      ad888888888888888888888'
           8888888888888698888888888888888888888888b_,ad88ba,_,d88888888888888888888888
           88888888888888888888888888888888888888888b,`"""^ d8888888888888888888888888I
           8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888baaad888888888888888888888888888'
           Y8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888P
           I888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888P^  ^Y8888888888888888888888'
           `Y88888888888888888P88888888888888888888888888'     ^88888888888888888888I
            `Y8888888888888888 `8888888888888888888888888       8888888888888888888P'
             `Y888888888888888  `888888888888888888888888,     ,888888888888888888P'
              `Y88888888888888b  `88888888888888888888888I     I888888888888888888'
                "Y8888888888888b  `8888888888888888888888I     I88888888888888888'
                  "Y88888888888P   `888888888888888888888b     d8888888888888888'
                     ^""""""""^     `Y88888888888888888888,    888888888888888P'
                                      "8888888888888888888b,   Y888888888888P^
                                       `Y888888888888888888b   `Y8888888P"^
                                         "Y8888888888888888P     `""""^
                         "Panda"           `"YY88888888888P'
                                                ^""""""""'


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               /        `~----'        _/'    \.       
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            ( ,          _.-~~~'       ......-'
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                                     ,.^^^\.../~/\       .==...==.
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             / /\ /\_   \_\_\/ / |      FFFF       /|
            | /  /  /^^^^^^^^^^\  \               / |
            \/ /   /  /  /  /   \  ^+..........,^^  /
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                              \ +|            \  / \_ _
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                          <^/ /  | \            ^--.___>
                           ^\/^\/^\_>                     


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                        `.__)_)      `.   /
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            ^^^^^^         )    \                      /. . \   "Georgia Bulldogs"
                           / . . \                     ^^^^^^
                           ^^^^^^^                             


                                         _,._
               _"BattleTech"___         (_~~_(==
               /_ '__ __ __ \___     ____|~~|________________
            .___/  / |-- \ `_\___       -'--`-___...---~~~  |   _i            ___...--
              __ -'-_`--__`-'__   ~~~~~~~~~~~|              /~|/ /~/~|       |~~~~~~~~
            ./---/--/-|-\--\---\.            |  ________ _ | /~/~|| /~\      |
          ./~~~.'~~/~~|~~\~~`.~~~\.          | 8--------] |@<-< <@]| /~~\    |
         /----/---/---|---\---\----\         |  ~~~~~~~~ ~`| \_\| _|_|\ _\   |
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              |                              |              _\===/ \_  ~\\\  |
              |                              |             / ~(_)~/~/|   \\\ |
              |                              |            |__||  |  | \   \>>|
              |                 .-_-.        |            |~~~\   \~~\|\     |
              |                 ||.||        |         _..|___|\  /~~~ <     |
              |_________________||X||________|__..--~~   / _  \/  \_==_/     |______._
         .--~~       ,____      .__     ._               ~~ ~~~             __.   -mR
              ,--,,-[~~]-,,-_,  R~   ._ R~.                                  7R __, _.
              [~~_~~~~~~~_~~~/  .    R~   Rm-                                  _,~R ~R
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            ;' / | | --|'|// ' /x xx / / xx|-- -  -- - -- - -|'(i/ ' /  /\/  \  / / /
           ;' / /\\|-n-|///x'x/x ___  ____ |- - --  - --  -- |'//x' /  | /  /\_ \/_/_/
          ;  / //\\ ~~~ //x' /xxxxx/ /x xxx|_ii__ii_n_ii__ii_|//x' /  / /  / / \____
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                                         _
                                      ==(W{==========-      /===-
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              "Fire-Breathing Dragon"                  :    ,'   
                                                       ~~~~~


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         :  ^    .'                           _.-"    ^      ; \.  ;      ^  ;
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            (-(-(-(-(--'' jgs `-._  ^ `.     `\`\              ^      .'   "Horned
                          __..---''     `._     `-. ^      ^      ^ .'      Dragon"
                 __..---''    ___....---'`-`)      `---...____..---'
                (-(-(-(-(---''             '                        


                                     _._
                                   _/:|:
                                  /||||||.
                                  ||||||||.
                                 /|||||||||:
                                /|||||||||||
                               .|||||||||||||
                               | ||||||||||||:
                             _/| |||||||||||||:_=---.._
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             `-----~~/ /'===...===' +   /
                    <_oo_>         /  //
                                  /  //
                                 <_oo_>      "Dimetrodon"


                                /~~~~~~~~~~~~\_
            _+=+_             _[~  /~~~~~~~~~~~~\_
           {''|''}         [~~~    [~   /~~~~~~~~~\_
            ''':-'~[~[~'~[~  ((++     [~  _/~~~~~~~~\_
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                           \\  \     \ (   .+~~\_  /.= /'''''
                           <'_V_'>      \\  \    ~~~~~~\\  \
                                         \\  \          \\  \
                                         <'_V_'>        <'_V_'>   "Ankylosaur"


                                       ___......__             _
                                   _.-'           ~-_       _.=a~~-_
           --=====-.-.-_----------~   .--.       _   -.__.-~ ( ___==>
                         '''--...__  (    \ \\\ { )       _.-~
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                                    |}      ||
                                   //       ||
                                 _//        {{
            "Hypsilophodon"   '='~'          \\_
                                              ~~'


                                 .       .
                                / `.   .' \
                        .---.  <    > <    >  .---.
                        |    \  \ - ~ ~ - /  /    |
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                       |  | {   }         \   \_\
                      '---.o___,'       .o___,'     "Stegosaurus"


                                                             .--.__
                                                           .~ (@)  ~~~---_
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                                   ~~-.______{_    _ -=\ / /_.~
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                                        :   / /      // /         ((
                                        :  / /      {   `-------,. ))
                                        :   /        ''=--------. }o
                           .=._________,'  )                     ))
                           )  _________ -''                     ~~
                          / /  _ _
                         (_.-.'O'-'.        "Deinonychus"


                                      <\              _
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                                      \ : /__
                                     //`Y'--\\
                                    <+       \\
                                     \\      WWW      "Pterodactyl"
                                     '


                                _
                             __~a~_
                             ~~;  ~_
               _                ~  ~_                _
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              (/ / / /, | | | |(/    \) | | | ,\ \ \ \)
             (/ / / / / | | | ~(/    \) ~ | | \ \ \ \ \)
            (/ / / / /  ~ ~ ~   (/  \)    ~ ~  \ \ \ \ \)
           (/ / / / ~          / (||)|          ~ \ \ \ \)
           ~ / / ~            M  /||\M             ~ \ \ ~
            ~ ~                  /||\                 ~ ~
                                //||\\
                                //||\\
                                //||\\
                                '/||\'        "Archaeopteryx"


                                              _..-=~=-._
                                         _.-~'          ~.
                             __..---~~~~~                 ~.
                        _.-~~                      _.._     ~.
                    _ -~_                         /    \      ;
                   ( ` '@)                       {      |      :
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                   |*| *   / /    / /      \  |     ([ ])     /|||(
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           __/||||__            '''                 -----
             _||_|__                                           "Maiasaur"


                            _..--+~/@-~--.
                        _-=~      (  .   '
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                   _~      _-       \ \_\
                  =      _=          '--'
                 '      =                             .
                :      :       ____                   '=_. ___
           ___  |      ;                            ____ '~--.~.
                ;      ;                               _____  } |
             ___=       \ ___ __     __..-...__           ___/__/__
                :        =_     _.-~~          ~~--.__
           _____ \         ~-+-~                   ___~=_______
                ~@#~~ == ...______ __ ___ _--~~--_                  "Pleisiosaur"


              _
            .~q`,
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                           |   |/           (     |   `.      \_
                           |   ||            ~\   \      '._    `-.._____..----..___
                           |   |/             _\   \         ~-.__________.-~~~~~~~~~'''
           "Brachiosaur" .o'___/            .o______}


                     _
                    //
                   //
                __/(
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                           `-.__//__.==~~=._\ (_/  ;  ;
                               //           | |/  ;  ;
                              {{       _____|_/ ;   ;        *     ___
                               `      ---- _=.=`   ~ _____   ||*    ____
                                       __:='    .='     ___\\||/___
           "Parasaurolophus"       ..:~____.==''


                                                  .--.
                                                 {(~~)}
                                __..._         _.''''a`,._
                            _.-'      '~-._.-~~     (  .__}
                         _-~                       _.`--j|
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           {    _.'     / /   | /
           {    =      {=+__  | :
           :   :_      `-- = \,_`-,.
            `.   '=,_
               '-.___'_::='         "Corythosaur"


                                 __.--'~~~~~`--.
              ..       __.    .-~               ~-.
              ((\     /   `}.~                     `.
               \\\  .{     }               /     \   \
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             `----._-~.     _\ \ |_       \   / /-.__     `._
                    ~~----~~  \ \| ~~--~~~(  + /     ~-._    ~-._
                              /  /         \  \          ~--.,___~_-_.
                           __/  /          _\  )
                         .<___.'         .<___/    "Triceratops"



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						***Anime***
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					***End Anime***
					===============


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                                        ______________
                           _____________\            /
                          |               __   __   /
                          |  __      __  | _  |__  /
                          | |__ |   |__| |__|  __| \
                          | |   |__ |  |            \
                          |                __________\
                          |________________\
                          |
                          |
                          |       The  Flags  Guide
                          |
                          |
                          |
                          |
                          |

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |XXXXXXX|==============| |======================| |\\\\    |    |    ////|
      |XXXXXXX|==============| |        __/\__        | |___\\\\_|    |_////___|
      |XXXXXXX|==============| |       `\/~~\/'       | |~~~~~~~~      ~~~~~~~~|
      |======================| |        /\__/\        | |________      ________|
      |======================| |       `~~\/~~'       | |~~~////~|    |~\\\\~~~|
      |======================| |======================| |////    |    |    \\\\|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
               U.S.A                 I S R A E L              B R I T A I N

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |      \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| |       _--~~--_       | |                      |
      |      ////////////////| |    _-~ _----_ ~-_    | |        _----_        |
      |      \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| | _-~   (. .  .)   ~-_ | |       (      )       |
      |      ////////////////| |`~-_   (.  . .)   _-~'| |       (      )       |
      |      \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| |    ~-_ ~----~ _-~    | |        ~----~        |
      |      ////////////////| |       ~--__--~       | |                      |
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
             Q A T A R                B R A Z I L               J A P A N

       _______________          ______________________   _
      |      | |      |        |                      | | ~-_
      |      | |      |        |        __/\__        | | o  ~-_
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      |      | |      |        |                      | |  *   \
      |      | |      |        |                      | |        \
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~
      S W I T Z E R L A N D         V I E T N A M        N E P A L

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |______________________| |            ||||||||||| |  __/\__   ###########|
      |          /\          | |  __||__    ||||||||||| |  \    /   ###########|
      |         /\/\         | |  ~~||~~    ||||||||||| |   |/\|    ###########|
      |        /\/\/\        | |            ||||||||||| ||||||||||||   __/\__  |
      |          ||          | |            ||||||||||| ||||||||||||   \    /  |
      |~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| |            ||||||||||| ||||||||||||    |/\|   |
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
           L E B A N O N               M A L T A              P A N A M A

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |_\\_| |_//_           | ||||||            |||||| |######################|
      |____   ____     *     | ||||||            |||||| |######################|
      | // | | \\    *   *   | ||||||   _/^\_    |||||| |######################|
      |                 .    | ||||||   \_ _/    |||||| |######################|
      |    (*)               | ||||||     |      |||||| |######################|
      |                *     | ||||||            |||||| |######################|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
         A U S T R A L I A           C A N A D A               L I B Y A

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |||||||||||||||||||||||| | \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| |===   ================|
      |######################| |   \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| |         =============|
      |#######,-~~~-,########| |    ##################| |===   ================|
      |#######`-___-'########| |    ##################| |======================|
      |######################| |   ///////////////////| |======================|
      |||||||||||||||||||||||| | /////////////////////| |======================|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
              L A O S                K U W A I T              G R E E C E

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      ||||||||||    #########| |~--__            __--~| |   ..                 |
      ||||||||||    #########| |_    ~~--____--~~    _| |  * .                 |
      |~~~~~~~~~    ~~~~~~~~~| | ~~--__  *  *  __--~~ | |   ..                 |
      |_________    _________| |   __--~  *   ~--__   | |                      |
      |#########    |||||||||| |-~~  __--~~~~--__  ~~-| |                      |
      |#########    |||||||||| |_--~~            ~~--_| |                      |
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
       D O M I N I C A N  Rep.      B U R U N D I              C H I N A

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |                      | |((((((((((()))))))))))| |((((((((((()))))))))))|
      |       /~/            | |((((((((/~~~~\))))))))| |((((((((/~~~~\))))))))|
      |      | |   *         | |((((((((  /   ))))))))| |(((((((        )))))))|
      |       \_\            | |((((((((  \ * ))))))))| |(((((((        )))))))|
      |                      | |((((((((\____/))))))))| |((((((((\____/))))))))|
      |                      | |((((((((((()))))))))))| |((((((((((()))))))))))|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
            T U R K E Y             T U N I S I A          B A N G L A D E S H

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@| |  ...   ||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |@@@@@@@@@@/\@@@@@@@@@@| | : O ;  ||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |@@@@@@@@\    /@@@@@@@@| |  """   ||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |@@@@@@@@/_/\_\@@@@@@@@| |||||||||||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@| |||||||||||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@| |||||||||||||||||||||||| |                      |
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
           S O M A L I A             T A I W A N

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |                      | |                      | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
      |                      | |                      | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
      |                      | |                      | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
      |######################| |||||||||||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |######################| |||||||||||||||||||||||| |                      |
      |######################| |||||||||||||||||||||||| |                      |
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
         S A N   M A R I N O          P O L A N D           I N D O N E S I A

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
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      |!!!!!!!        #######| |#######        !!!!!!!| |!!!!!!!        @@@@@@@|
      |!!!!!!!        #######| |#######        !!!!!!!| |!!!!!!!        @@@@@@@|
      |!!!!!!!        #######| |#######        !!!!!!!| |!!!!!!!        @@@@@@@|
      |!!!!!!!        #######| |#######        !!!!!!!| |!!!!!!!        @@@@@@@|
      |!!!!!!!        #######| |#######        !!!!!!!| |!!!!!!!        @@@@@@@|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
           I R E L A N D        I V O R Y   C O A S T          I T A L Y

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      | __/\__               | | __/\__ ||||||||||||||| | __/\__  =============|
      | \    /               | | \    / ||||||||||||||| | \    /  =============|
      |  |/\|                | |  |/\|  ||||||||||||||| |  |/\|   =============|
      |                      | |XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX| |======================|
      |                      | |XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX| |======================|
      |                      | |XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX| |======================|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
            B E N I N                C H I L E               L I B E R I A

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      | __/\__ ::::::::::::::| |~~--_\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| |~~--@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@|
      | \    / ##############| |__/\__-_\\\\\\\\\\\\\\| |__/\__-@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@|
      |  |/\|  ::::::::::::::| |\    /  ~-_\\\\\\\\\\\| |\    /  ~-_           |
      |######################| | |/\|   _-~///////////| | |/\|   _-~           |
      |::::::::::::::::::::::| |     _-~//////////////| |     _-###############|
      |######################| |__--~/////////////////| |__--##################|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
             T O G O                  J I B U T I         Sou.   Y E M E N

       ______________________   ______________________   ______________________
      |~~--##################| |~~--!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!| |~~--##################|
      |__/\__-_              | |     ~-!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!| |     ~-###############|
      |\    /  ~-############| |   *    ~-_           | |        ~-_           |
      | |/\|   _-~           | |        _-~           | |        _-~           |
      |     _-###############| |     _-XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX| |     _-:::::::::::::::|
      |__--~                 | |__--XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX| |__--::::::::::::::::::|
       ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
              C U B A                  J O R D A N              Y E M E N


====================================================================
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  :iITIIIITT8888888888HTT8T8T8HHH8TTTTTITTTTTTT8T8TT888T8T88T888T888888888T8888
  :iiiiIITT8888888888T888HTT8T88888TTITT88TTTTTTT888TT8888T88888888888888888888
   :iiiIITT8T88888888888888T8888888TTIITITITT8TT8T8T88T888888888888888888888888
    :iiIITTT888T8TTTTTTT888888888T8TTIITITITTT88T88T8888888888888888888888888T8
     :iiIIiTTTTTTTTii:..""TTT8T88TTIIiTTTITTT8T88T8T8888888888888888888888T8888
      :iiIiiiiIiTi8TTii:....:TTTTTIiiTIITTITT888T888888888888888888T8888T88TMrK
       :iiIiiiiiTiTi8i8TTTIiiiiiiTITTTTITT8TT8T8T88T8888888T888888T888T88T88TT8
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         :iiiITTiTiI8i888888888T88T88TT8TT8TTTT8TT88T88T88888T88T88T88TTT8TTT8T
          :IITIiTT:ii888888T8T8T8T8T888TT8TTTTT88T88T88888T88T8T8T8TTTT8TTTTTTT
          :iiITTTi:iI88TT8888T8T8T8TTTTT8TTTTT8TT8TT88TT88T8TTT8TTTT8TT8TTT8TTT
           :iiiiIIiIIiiiiTT888T88TTT8TTTTTTT8TTT8TT8TT8T88TTTT8TT8TTTTTTTTTTTTT
           i::::iII::::::iiTT88888T88T8TTTTTTTTTTTT8T8TTTTTT8TTTTTTTT8TTTTTTTTT
          ::::::::::::::::::::iTTTT8TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT8TTT8TTTTTT8TTTTTTTITTTTTIT
          ::iii::::::iiiiii::::iiiiiiTTTTITTTITTTT8TTTTTTTT8TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTITTI
          Ii8iTTIiiITTTTTTTTTT8888TIIITTITTITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTITTTTITTTITI
          `IIi888TTT88888TTTTTTTTTTTTTITTTTTTTITTTTTITTTITTITTTTTITTITTTTTITTII
           ::iTTTTiiTTTTTTTTTIIIIIIIITTTITTTITTTTTTITTTITTTTTITTTTITTTTITIIITII
            :::::::::::ii:iiiIIITIIITIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTITTTTIITIIITIIITIIIIITIITI
             `:i::ii:i:i:ii:iiIIIITIIIITTITTITTTITTITTTIIITIIIIIITIIIIIiiiiiiii
              `i:ii:iiii:iiIIIITIIITTITTTTTTTTITTITTIITIIIIIIIIiiiiiiIIIIiiiiii
               ii:iii:IIIiTITTIITTITTITTTTTTITTITTTIIIIIIIITiiiii:iiiiiiiiiiiii
               :iT:IIIIiTIITIITITTTITTTTTITTITTTTIIITIIIIiiii:ii:iiiiiiiiiiiiii
                :iTTiiiiITITTITTITTITTTITTITTIITIIIiiii:iii:iIITiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
                 :iTTiiiiTiIITITTITTTTTIITIIIIIIII:ii:i::i:iiiTIi:Tiiiiiiiiiiii
                  ::TTIiiiTiiTIITIITIIITIIITI:Iii:i:::::i:i:iTITiTIiiiiiiiiiiii
                    ::Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii:::::::::::i:ii:I:TTiTiiiiiiiiiiiiii
                      ```::::::::::::::::::::::i::ii:ii:ITI:TiiTiiTiiiiiiiiiiii
                                      .:::::::i:i::ii:ITTI:Ii:iTiiiiiiiiiiiiiii



  iiiiiiiiiiiiii:ii:::::...:......                             ...........::::
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  iiiiiii:iiiiii:iiiii:i:::::::: :: ::: ::: ::::: ::: ::: ::::i:ii:iiii:iii:i:
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  :::i:::::::::  .aT8888888888:::::i:::;::...::.::.::.::..8888Tb. ...    ...
  i::::::::::  .dT888888888888b:i:;;i:i::i:::ii::;i;;;:i:d8888TTTb  ...
  :::::::: :  dTTT8888888888888b;ii;;i;i;iii;;iii;;i;i;:d888TTTTTTb
  ::::: : :  dTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTbiiii;;iiiiiiiiiii;idTTTTTTTIITTTTP
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  ::::::::i::::ii:i:iii:ii::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::ii:ii:i::i::
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  ::::::i::i:ii:iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii





        `888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888"
     _   "8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888""
    / `-..`88888888888888888888888888"' `"88888888888888888888888888"..
           `8888888888888888888"'            "888888888888888888888    `.
             888888888888888"'          /         "888888888888888'     `.
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  _______________|           |__|.- '         ` -.|__|           |______________
   .  .... . ..  `.._______..'           ..   ...    `.._______..' .. .. ..... .




              .o oOOOOOOOo                                            OOOo
              Ob.OOOOOOOo  OOOo.      oOOo.                      .adOOOOOOO
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              `O'OOOO'     `OOOOo"OOOOOOOOOOO` .adOOOOOOOOO"oOOO'    `OOOOo
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             `9XXXXXXXXXXXP' `9XX'   DIE    `98v8P'  HUMAN   `XXP' `9XXXXXXXXXXXP'
                 ~~~~~~~       9X.          .db|db.          .XP       ~~~~~~~
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               ...... ! MMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPOOOOIII! ! ...
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              ........ MMMMMOOOOOOPPPPPPPPOOOOMII! ...
               ....... MMMMM..    OPPMMP    .,OMI! ....
                ...... MMMM::   o.,OPMP,.o   ::I!! ...
                  .... NNM:::.,,OOPM!P,.::::!! ....
                    .. MMNNNNNOOOOPMO!!IIPPO!!O! .....
                    ... MMMMMNNNNOO:!!:!!IPPPPOO! ....
                      .. MMMMMNNOOMMNNIIIPPPOO!! ......
                     ...... MMMONNMMNNNIIIOO!..........
                  ....... MN MOMMMNNNIIIIIO! OO ..........
               ......... MNO! IiiiiiiiiiiiI OOOO ...........
             ...... NNN.MNO! . O!!!!!!!!!O . OONO NO! ........
              .... MNNNNNO! ...OOOOOOOOOOO .  MMNNON!........
              ...... MNNNNO! .. PPPPPPPPP .. MMNON!........
                 ...... OO! ................. ON! .......
                    ................................


 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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 ::::::::' .##P  """"###" 9####.  ::::::::::::::::::::::::::''   '':::::::::
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            ####" ## "##"# ###"    ##  ## ## "# ## ## ## "##"# ## ##
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            ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: ,// //''''''//// /////// /  :::::::::::
            ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::  // //________//// ////// //  ::::::::::
            ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: '// '           ' '''// ///' ::::::::::
            ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::   .mmm#########bmmm.   '//   `::::::::
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            :*:::::       " ::: ##b :::..  '######################m0  :::::::::::::
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            ::::: mmm %%%%%%% : ###m ::::' .########"  "0""########  ::::::::::::::
            ::::  """ %%%%%'     '9# ::::  ####"         .m########m.  ''        ''
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            :::::::::::::::::::::. "  xXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXRADIUSXXXXX

				***Magic: The Gathering sympols***
				==================================

                            ..:::::::::..
                       ..::::::Yb;::::::::::..
                    .::::::::d888Yb;::::::::::::.
                  .::::::::d8P?::::Y8a::::::::::::.
                .::::::::::::::::::::?8b::::::::::::.
               :::::::::::::::::::::::::Yb::::::::::::
              ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::88a::::::::::
             ::::::::::::::::::::::::::a888??Yb;::::::::
            .::::::::::::::::::::::::a888?:::::Yb;::::::.
            ::::::::::::::::::::::a888?::::::::::Yba:::::
            ::::::::::::::::::::a888?::::::::::::::?Yb;::
            ::::::::::::::::::a888?::::::::::::::::;d8Yb:
            `::::::::::::::a888?::::::::::::::::::;d8P?:'
             ::::::::::::a888?:::::::::::::::::::;8P::::
              ::Yb:::::a888?:::::::::::::::::::::::::::
               :::Ybad88?:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
                `:::Y88:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::'
                  `:::Yb::::::::::::::::::::::::::'
                    `:::Yb::::::::::::::::::::::'
                       ``:::::::::::::::::::''
                            ``:::::::::''          "Tap symbol"


                            ..:::a:::::..
                       ..:::::::d8::::::::::..
                    .::::::::::d88b:::::::::::::.
                  .:::::::::::d8888:::::::::::::::.
                .::::::::::::d88888b::::::::::::::::.
               :::::::::::::d8888888::::::::::::::::::
              ::::::::::::d888888888b::::::::::::::::::
             ::::::::::::d88888888888b::::::::::::::::::
            .:::::::::::d88888888888888b::::::::::::::::.
            :::::::::::d888888888888888888a::::::::::::::
            ::::::::::d888888888888888b:Y88b:::::::::::::
            :::::::::d88888888888888888b:888b::::::::::::
            `::::::::8888888888888888888:Y888b::::::::::'
             ::::::::8888888888888888888::Y888::::::::::
              :::::::Y888888888888888888?:d88P:::::::::
               :::::::Y88888888888888888bd88P:::::::::
                `:::::::Y88888888888888888P:::::::::'
                  `::::::Y88888888888888P:::::::::'
                    `::::::Y8888888888P:::::::::'
                       ``::::::Y888P::::::::''
                            ``:::::::::''          "Blue Mana"


                            ..:::::::::..
                       ..:::::?Y8888888b::::..
                    .:::::d8888P:::Y8888888b::::.
                  .:::::d88888b:::::Y88P::Y888b:::.
                .::::::d8P:::::::::::88::::88888b:::.
               :::::::P:d:::::::::::d??ba:d8888888b:::
              :::::::::?::::::::::::::::::::::Y8888b:Y:
             ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::Y8888b:Y:
            .::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::b::88888:8:.
            :::::::::::::::::;;:::::::;;a:::::b::888888::
            :::::::::::::::d8888baaaaa88::::::)P:888888::
            :::::::::::::d8888888888888P::::::d:d88888P::
            `:::::::::::d88888888888P::::::::d8888888P::'
             ::::::::::d88888888888P::::::d8888888P::;::
              ::::::::d888888888888::::d88888888P?:dP::
               :::::::888888888888888888888888888bdP::
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                            ``:::::::::''          "Red Mana"


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                       ``:::::::Y8P:::::::::''
                            ``:::::::::''          "White Mana"


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                       ``:::::::::::::::::::''
                            ``:::::::::''          "Black Mana"


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                            ``:::::::::''          "Green Mana"


 
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            `*************** {SSSSS'   \      (x)         ||||||||||| **************'
             `*************  /          ~-_   /~          ||||||||||| *************'
              `************ |            / ~~~\______--~  ||||||||||| ************'
               `*********** |           | \ ****** /      ||||||||||| ***********'
                `********* |   _-----__ |  \ **** /       ||||||||||| **********'
                  ~******* |           ~~-__`----/ __----_||||||||||| ********~
                    ~***** |                ~~-_/ /       |||||||\\\\\ *****~
                      ~** |                     ~~--__     \\\\\\\\\\\\ **~
                        ~**                           ~~----\\\\\\\\\\**~
                          ~**                                \\\\\\\**~
                            ~** --__                          \\\\**~
                              ~**,. ~~--__                    ||**~
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                                  ~************;,.. ~~~~~~~.**~
                                    ~***********************~
                                      ~*******************~
                                        ~***************~
                                          ~***HK'93***~
                                            ~*******~
                                              ~***~      
                                               `*'


           88888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
           88.._|      | `-.  | `.  -_-_ _-_  _-  _- -_ -  .'|   |.'|     |  _..88
           88   `-.._  |    |`!  |`.  -_ -__ -_ _- _-_-  .'  |.;'   |   _.!-'|  88
           88      | `-!._  |  `;!  ;. _______________ ,'| .-' |   _!.i'     |  88
           88..__  |     |`-!._ | `.| |_______________||."'|  _!.;'   |     _|..88
           88   |``"..__ |    |`";.| i|_|MMMMMMMMMMM|_|'| _!-|   |   _|..-|'    88
           88   |      |``--..|_ | `;!|l|MMoMMMMoMMM|1|.'j   |_..!-'|     |     88
           88   |      |    |   |`-,!_|_|MMMMP'YMMMM|_||.!-;'  |    |     |     88
           88___|______|____!.,.!,.!,!|d|MMMo * loMM|p|,!,.!.,.!..__|_____|_____88
           88      |     |    |  |  | |_|MMMMb,dMMMM|_|| |   |   |    |      |  88
           88      |     |    |..!-;'i|r|MPYMoMMMMoM|r| |`-..|   |    |      |  88
           88      |    _!.-j'  | _!,"|_|M<>MMMMoMMM|_||!._|  `i-!.._ |      |  88
           88     _!.-'|    | _."|  !;|1|MbdMMoMMMMM|l|`.| `-._|    |``-.._  |  88
           88..-i'     |  _.''|  !-| !|_|MMMoMMMMoMM|_|.|`-. | ``._ |     |``"..88
           88   |      |.|    |.|  !| |u|MoMMMMoMMMM|n||`. |`!   | `".    |     88
           88   |  _.-'  |  .'  |.' |/|_|MMMMoMMMMoM|_|! |`!  `,.|    |-._|     88
           88  _!"'|     !.'|  .'| .'|[@]MMMMMMMMMMM[@] \|  `. | `._  |   `-._  88
           88-'    |   .'   |.|  |/| /                 \|`.  |`!    |.|      |`-88
           88      |_.'|   .' | .' |/                   \  \ |  `.  | `._    |  88
           88     .'   | .'   |/|  /                     \ |`!   |`.|    `.  |  88
           88  _.'     !'|   .' | /                       \|  `  |  `.    |`.|  88
           88 vanishing point 888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888(FL)888

    

 


                .         .      /\      .:  *       .          .              .       
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              aaa@@@@@@aa   |===|||||_||      |===|_.|u|_.|+HH+|_/_/_/_/aa    a@@@@@@@@
          aa@@@@@@@@@@@@@@a |~~|~~~~\---/~-.._|--.---------.~~~`.__ _.@@@@@@a    ~~~~~~
            ~~~~~~    ~~~    \_\\ \  \/~ //\  ~,~|  __   | |`.   :||  ~~~~             
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          aaa   aaaa       a@@@@\| \  //'   |  // \`| |  `.'  .' | |  aa@@@@@@@@@@@@@a 
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         @S.C.E.S.W.@@@@a          \// |.`  ` ' /~  :-'   .'|  '/~aa                   
         ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~         a@@@|   \\ |   // .'    .'| |  |@@@@@@a                
                             a@@@@@@@\   | `| ''.'     .' | ' /@@@@@@@@@a              


          ____  _____ ___________________________________________________ _____
         |___  |    //       :-...__                       __...-:       \\    | | _ |
         |     |   //        :  `.  ~~--._           _.--~~  .'  :        \\   | |/ \|
          ___  |  //          :  `..._    ~~-.___.-~~    _..,'  :          \\  |  ____
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         |  \  |//        ..-'    :  :..  ~-._   _.-~  ..:  :    `-..        \\| |____
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           _   | .'    .'`.__.'     ~`._   .`_.-._'.   _.'~     `.__,'`.    `. | S :
          / \  |.'   ..'      ~`-.      ~-.`~ _._ ~'.-~      .-'~      `..   `.|  C|/
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               |               `.     .' ..-'     `-.. `.     .'               |   : W
         |      \                `-. .'-'             `-`. .-'                / 
         |____ |\\                 .'         ___         `.                 //|
               | \\                :      .--~   ~--.      :                // |
               |__\\_______________`.__.-~___________~-.__.'_______________//__|
                                                                                    


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         WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZAR..::::::::::::::..IZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD.::::::::::::::::::::::::::.WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWI.:::::::::'mmMMMMMMMMMMMmm`::::::::.RDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDWIZAR.:::::::'mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMm`::::::.IZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDWI.::::::'mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMm`::::.ARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDW.::::'mMMMMMM"            "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMm`:::.DWIZARDWIZA D
         WIZARDWIZAR.::::'mMMMM"   mmMMMMMm          "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMm`:::.IZARDWIZAr
         WIZARDWIZ.::::'mMMMM mmMMMMMMMMMMMMMm          "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMZARDWIZ42
         WIZARDWI.:::'mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMm           "MMMMMMMMMMMM     ARDWIZa
         WIZARDW.:::'mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMm            MMMMMMMMM      RDWIZ  I
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         WIZAR.:::'mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM    MMMM"              MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMW"   iD
         WIZA.:::'MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM           MMMm             MMMMMMMMM           .AD
         WIZA:::'mMMMMMMMMMMMMM                 MMM         mMMMMMMMMM            ARD
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         WIZ:::'MMMMMMMMMM              mMMm       MM     mM     MMM            M:ARD
         WI.:::MMMMMMMMM               mMMMMMm      MM   mM        M          mM::.RD
         WI:::'MMMMMMM                mMMMMMMM       MM mM  mM              mMM`:::RD
         WI:::mMMMMMM                mMMMMMMMM        MMM  mMMMM         mMMMMMm:::.D
         W':::MMMMMM                mMMMMMMMMMMM          mMMMMMMM   mMMMMMMMMMM:::`D
         W:::'MMMMM        mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MM        mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM`:::D
         i:::iMMMM      mMMMMM     MMMMMMMMMM   MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMi:::D
         z:::IMMM"    mMMMMMMM      MMMMMMMM                            MMMMMMMMI:::)
         a:::iMMM   mMMMMMMMMMM     MMMMMMMM                             MMMMMMMi:::D
         r:::`MMM  MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM                            MMMMMMM,:::D
         d`:::MMm mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM  MM               mMMMm      MMMMMMMM:::,D
         W`:::mMMM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM    MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM       mMMMMMMMm:::.D
         WI:::`MMMmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM            mMMMMMMMMM        mMMMMMMMM,:::RD
         WI`:::MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM           mMMMMMMMMM          MMMMMMMMM:::'RD
         WIZ:::.MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM          mMMMMMMMMM           mMMMMMMMM':::ARD
         WIZ`MMMMM"""       ""MMMMMMM         mMMMMMMMMM             MMMMMMMMm:::'ARD
         WIZA"                    "M        mMMMMMMMMM              mMMMMMMMM'::'ZARD
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         W  ZAMMMm                      mMMMMMMMMM                  MMMMMMM,:::'IZARD
         WIZARD`::Mm                  MMMMMMMMMM        mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM,:::'WIZARD
         WIZARDW`:::M              mMMMMMMMMMMM     mMMMMMMMM      MMMMMMMm::'DWIZARD
         WIZARDWI`::MM          mMMMMMMMMMMMMM   mMMMMMMMMMM             MM:'RDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZAM MM      mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM  mMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmMMM:ZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZA   Mm   mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM" mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM'::::'IZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZ     M mMM.MMMMMMMMMMMMMMm mMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.::::'DWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWI    DWMm`::::"MMMMMMMMMMMMm MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM".::::'ARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDW   ARDWIZAR`:::::."MMMMMMMMMmMMMMMMMMMMMMMM".:::::'WIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDW  ZARDWIZARDWI`:::::::.""MMMMMMMMMMMM"".::::::::'RDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDW  ZARDWIZARDWIZAR`::::::::::::::::::::::::::'WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZAR``::::::::::::::''IZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD
         WIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARDWIZARD

           "Wizard"

            ____________________________________________________________
           |      /)      /)         |      _ ___ _  _   ___ _  __      |
           |  /) //    /)//       () |     ( ` / /| /_)   / /_)/_ /_/   |
           | /||// _  ////_  _  _ /  |    __) / /-|/ \   / / \/__/ \    |
           |  /,| /,)/////,)/ )/ )/) |           _  _   _      _ __     |
           | //||( ///////////////,| |    /|/| /( `( `// )/|/  _) / /   |
           |(/ ||/\_(_((_/( /( //\_) |   / ' |/__)__)/(_// /  /_ / /    |
           |   |_)      __//_//      |                                  |
           |                  _      |                           /|     |
           |  /\ |||| /\  /\ | \     |                          /||     |
           | </\>|||||/\>|/\|||\|    |\                        //||     |
           |  \  ||||||  |L||||/|    |\\       _.--"""""""--. // ||     |
           |   \ ||||||T||  || /     | \\   .="              "=, ||     |
           | <\/>|\/||\/|||||||\     |  \\,'                   ``.|     |
           |  \/  \/  \/ ||||||\>    |   ,                        :     |
           |                         |  .                          :    |
           | /\ |\ /| /\  /\ || />/\ |  : aMIttti==iii+iii+=;,      :   |
           |</\>| V ||/\||/\>||//</\>|  : BMMMWWWMMMBXVVYYi=;,      :___|
           | \  || |||L||||  |'/  \  |  : BBMMWWMMMMBXXVYIi;;:,,    :.__|
           |  \ ||V|||  |||  |.\   \ |  t XIBMMMMMBRXVi+==::;:::    ',  |
           |<\/>|| |||||||\/>||\\<\/>| At VY+=+IIMBi=:,,=i=;::::,    ;. |
           | \/ || |||||| \/ || \>\/ | YX=VI+=,:=WB;:::=,,::;;:;:   ;;' |
           |_________________________| VMiRtItIRBWR:.tXVVYtiI==;:  ;;Y: |
           |    //                     `XIWMMBBMRMBi;,XXRRXXVYt+;; ;A;' |
           |   //                       ViWWMBBBBBY;;,XRRRXXVi;;;:,;;;  |
           |  //                        `VMMMMWBMMY;=+XRRXVYI;:;;:,C;   |
           | //    SPACE ENERGY COMES    XRBMMMYYV+,:;XRXXIt+;:;+,+;;   |
           |<<                           `RRBMMBYt;:::+VXVi=;;:;=+;;'  /|
           | \\     FROM SUGAR SMACKS     BRBBBMMRRIttYYYY=;;;;;==;   //|
           |  \\                          VRRRRRRRXVYYttit=:::::=;   // |
           |   \\       _____              YRRRXVIYiit+++i=:;::;==  //  |
           |   //      /|===|\             +RRXIIYVI;i=;=t=;:::;:; <<   |
           |  //       || _ ||\             RRXVYi+==;;=iY;::::,;;  \\  |
           | //        ||/ \||O)            `XRXVVVYItitII=::;,::;   \\ |
           |//        [|( @ )|/]             `VRRBBXVYYIti:::,:::;    \\|
           |<         `||\_/|| |              IYVYYYIti+=:,,,:::;;     \|
           |\\         ||   [] |              IVI==;;;:,,,,Jittlov\    /|
           | \\       ,vMMR""b c,            /   "=;;;;="""        \__//|
           |  \\      VVMM$;;; $;;        __/                    __/ // |
           |   \\    ;AVMMM,,,:MM;   __---  \              ____--   <<  |
           |    \\   :VMMMn;;;IAM;_--    ,   \__________---          \\ |
           |     >>  `AMMMM,,,iCV;      /|                            \\|
           |    //    `VMMnn;;"Y",     /@|              _  _  _  _     \|
           |   //      YVMM,,,;;;     /_ |             ( `/_)/ )/ `/_/  |
           |  //       YVMMM;,,;;    '~ \|        _   __)/  (_/(_,/~\   |
           | //         YVMV;;;;:    __  `      _(_)                   /|
           |//           IMMm'__ ___(__)____   (__)_)                 //|
           |========      ___(__)_((_)_(__)_)_(_))_)_)_              << |
           |      ||    _((_((__)__(_(__(__)__)(__)_(_))      FREE    \\|
           |      ||   (__)((_(__)_))_(__)_((__)_((__)"))              \|
           |      ||   \================================/  STAR TREK    |
           |      ||  ''\______________________________/                |
           |      || //  \                            /      BADGES     |
           |      ||//    \__________________________/       ______     |
           |      | /      \            _           /                   |
           |   10 1/2 oz SIZE          (c) Paramount Pictures Corp 1969 |  
           |____________________________________________________________|  



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            ,:+|t;+MRRRX|YMMRMMRRMMRMRRRXRVVXVVtYYIIi||::                        .:.
            ,+=.,=MMMRIVRMMMRMMRRRRRRRXXVXVVYVVttttt||++.                         ..
           +t+:.+MMMMMRMMMMMMMRMRRXRXRXRXXXRXYtt|i|||=+,.                          .
           ,,.,tRMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMRRXRRRRXVYVXYtIiYIiI+=: .                           
           .: ,iMRMRRMRXRRMMRMRRRRXRRRRXRXXRVYYttt+;,.                              
           .,.,|XRRRRRRRMMMMMRMRRMRRRRRRRRRRRXRYii=:.,. ..                          
           .,. :VMRMMMMMRRXRRRMMRMXRRRRXRRRRXYY++==::,,... .                        
          . ;. :YRMMRRRXtI++;|VRRMMMRRRRRVttt|;:=,:::,,,,.  .                       
           .,. :XMXYt+:.    .,+++tXXXRRRt+..                                        
             , ;X;  :=YYti;:;,;=|IYVVVtIi:        ,|==,.                            
            .;,Ii;;|iii+:,..:==;|YVXXXVY,        ==;,,:..                           
             ::Y=|=,    ,  , ,,;+IYRRXY+      =. :                                  
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             .YRXVVYi|itVt|++||VYVVXVY+.    iYt|IIIi=:.                             
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            ,+MMMMMMRMRMMRMRVXVYYVXVti;  .,:,=||tttttii|i|=|;;...                  
            ,=RMMMMMMMMMMMMRRYXYVXVVI+.    :,=iYYtY|IYittI|i+=..                  
            ,|XRMRRRRMMMMMMMRVtVXVVIi=,     :i|iYVXXXYYIiI=+.,                   
            .=IXRMRMMMMMMMMRYIXRRMVY=,       +VVYYVXVVYIII|=...                 
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            .:;ttVVRRMMRRttVI=..i;;..          .|YVVtIII||:.                  
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             :==IYXVXXVVVRXXYVYXRRYYiIt+:;,;,:;:;=++ii|;:,.                 
           .,;++iItVVXXXXVYYtVVRRXYYYVti|=.,:.,: ...,;::; .  .             
          ..==i||tVYVVVVYYYtYVVXRXYVXVVi+=;=,:,,,    ,:;;:,...            .
          .:;|+I;|YVIYViiiIVVVVtIYI||++;;;,.  .,.....  .: .               ,
          .,;=+t||ItVYYI+:;;==,  ..,..   .        .,,,.,:.                :
          .,;iii+;+iIVi++|tVII|, .;=t=::;=i;.     =|==:=.                 .
           .,:||+;;=+YttVVVIYVRRRRRXXRRYi++:;... :+Yi+;,                  .
           :;+iiIi=;||YXXXXXtVttiiI+i|:;:,; ,;,,;+Iii;,                   :
         i ,=+|i+|=::=itXVXXVVti+;=|::,,,,,;++||i==,:                     =
         MR ,=|||=:::;|tYVYXXVXVtYYII+=+++;+IYY|=,, .                     ;.
         RRR+.+||++;,:;+IYYVVXXXRXVXXVVItiIiItt+:                         ;;
           .;=||+|=;.,.=iIYRXRXXRRRXXXVYtV|itt|;.                         ;=
          .,,=+|+=:,:   .+IYYVVYVRXRRRXY|+;++=;.                          :+,
           .,:+=;;;,;..  ,+=ItItYYYItVt|=;.,                              .+I:
           ,;;==;=;:::.. .YYI+=+;==:==;,.                                  ,.      .
           .,=;+==.,|     tYIi+++.                                                 .
            .;=:;tRR=     iXtiii||;;.                                              ,
            :|XRRRXX=      iYtt|Iiii=+;.                                            
         RRRRRXVtYYYi.      :ItIYY|=i||;+=;:.                                       
         tVXVtt+iYVVYi,       ,itYIiit||:;:,.                                       
         itYVVttIYYtIII;         .+iVYYIi+=,,.., ,=:,                             ,=
         YVXVYtiItI+|iI|,                                                      ,=::+
         tttYYiIXYi|Iii|i|                                                ,+==+=+:,+
         XtIIiYXVti|itIItI|.                                           .+||=.,:::..|
         =:;ItVIIi|+iIIIi:                                          .+++|+|;=,:===|I
         +iYVYYii|it|i|=,    . .                                 ,+==,:,=;;+;;:;=;;I
         =iIYttII|++iii|;  ..                                 :+;=+=:;,,:=;;=;;=;==i
         +IiItttItiittYi;..  .                            :|||+++=i|++=:;;+++||_c_JE

           "Kirk"     -Jens Ehlert



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                      OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooOOOOOO 111111111111111111111111
                      OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 111111111111111111111111
           |         OOOOOOo`OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 111111`ooo`1111111111111
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          @@ @@ @@ @@ @@@~OOOoo~~OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO',11111OOOOOOOo~OOOOOOOOOOO'OOOOOO

           "Spock"    



                                                .
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                                         \_  _/      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                           \/



                           . . ...
                        .:::'.`:::::.
                       ::::::  '::::::
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                      :::::: MAM ::::::
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          :::::..       "YTl995PPPT77"      ..:::::::::::::  "Candle"
          :::::::::...                 ...:::::::::::::::::
          ::::::::::::::::.........::::::::::::::::::::::::  



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          |||||||||||||.   |          ||                               :|||
          ||||||||||||||||||          |||                     : ___   ::`||
          ||||||||||||||||||          `||:: `._             _.-':::::::::||
          ||||||||||||||||||           |||||   `-._     _.-'       ::::::|'
          ||||||||||||||||||           |||||::     `\/~'              ::|'
          |||||||||||||'   |           `||||:        \                  |
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          |||||/~~~~~~~~~.              `||:::         |               |'
          ||||   /\   /\  `.             ||::::         |              |
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          ||  : ________ :  |            `||:::::       |             |
          ||    \##_#_#/   .'             |||:::::      |             |
           \| ____________'
                                "The Executioner"


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            '\/  <^\      /^>               |  `   (  <   \\           The Brain"
                 _\ >-__-< /_             ,-\  ,-~~->. \   `:.___,/
                (___\    /___)           (____/    (____)    `---'   




        ?????????????????????????????????????? . ######################################
        ?????????????????????????????????????  %  #####################################
        ????????????????????????????????????  %*:  ####################################
        ???????????????????????????????????  %#*?:  ###################################
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        ??????????????????????????????                   ##############################
        ???????????????????????????????????????*#######################################

          "Spades"     


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                                                      ]8888888^iiiiiiiii^888888]
                                                        iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
                                                            ^^^^^^^^^^^^^



        +-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
        | |       |\                                           -~ /     \  /          |
        |~~__     | \                                         | \/       /\          /|
        |    --   |  \                                        | / \    /    \     /   |
        |      |~_|   \                                   \___|/    \/         /      |
        |--__  |   -- |\________________________________/~~\~~|    /  \     /     \   |
        |   |~~--__  |~_|____|____|____|____|____|____|/ /  \/|\ /      \/          \/|
        |   |      |~--_|__|____|____|____|____|____|_/ /|    |/ \    /   \       /   |
        |___|______|__|_||____|____|____|____|____|__[]/_|----|    \/       \  /      |
        |  \mmmm :   | _|___|____|____|____|____|____|___|  /\|   /  \      /  \      |
        |      B :_--~~ |_|____|____|____|____|____|____|  |  |\/      \ /        \   |
        |  __--P :  |  /                                /  /  | \     /  \          /\|
        |~~  |   :  | /                                 ~~~   |  \  /      \      /   |
        |    |      |/                        .-.             |  /\          \  /     |
        |    |      /                        |   |            |/   \          /\      |
        |    |     /                        |     |            -_   \       /    \    |
        +-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
        |          |  /|  |   |  2  3  4  | /~~~~~\ |       /|    |_| ....  ......... |
        |          |  ~|~ | % |           | | ~J~ | |       ~|~ % |_| ....  ......... |
        |   AMMO   |  HEALTH  |  5  6  7  |  \===/  |    ARMOR    |#| ....  ......... |
        +-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
                  "From the people who gave you VI - NEW Ascii DOOM!" 






                                     ...,ooooooooo......
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         "Swan"     88888888888V                  V88888v  "88888888888
                    88888888888v                            "8888888888
         ____________8888888888888v.........................v888888888_____________
         :::::::::::::::::::::::::'                         :::::::::::::::::::::::
         :::::::::::::::::::::::                .:::::::    .::::::::::::::::::::::
         ::::::::::::::::::::::                 :::::::  .:::::::::::::::::::::::::
         :::::::::::::::::::::                  ::::::  ::: :::::::::::::::::::::::
         :::::::::::::::::::::.                 ::::::. :: .:::::::::::::::::::::::
         ::::::::::::::::::::::                 :::::::.  .::::::::::::::::::::::::
         :::::::::::::::::::::.           .     :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
         :::::::::::::::::::::          :::.   ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
         ::::::::::::::::::::::.::.:: :::::::.:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
         ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::Meindert+Stewart::::::




          .             -)------+====+           . "Red Five standing by."     .
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                       ,'"",'.   `.       `'```''```'  '   ``  ' . ``'```'' .  `' `'
         +      -)-----====   `.   `.   .                  .
            .          -)-------+====+     . 









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 HHHIIIIIII''''





"Meriday in the Morning" by Mike Jittlov.

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Subject: SNOWWHITE
From: mark.van.hooren@onlinesys.com (Mark Van Hooren)
Date: Wed, 21 Dec 94 15:00:00 -0500

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     dHHHHHH~~  '~~9HHHHb               ....._________    _____.........__
     HHHHH~         ~9HHH             .'              :  :                :
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        ::`.   ~ ~   ': $:$:$H):(::: :  ~HH$HHn     -. ~~  .'
         ::   -~-~- . 'H$::$H((: : :  '   HH:H$       :   :
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:::::::...|../\XXXX/\HHHHH\:::      ._)    :HH$$$H :       : `-.
:..........|/..\XX/..HHHHHHn::`.          ':HHHHHH ;       :    :
...............|XX|.HHHHHHHH$:     .=-=.   :HH$HH :        `.   :
...............XXXXHHH$HHH$HH::    `...'  .$HHH$H$'          :   :
...............XXXHHHH$HH:$HH$::.       ..H$HHHH$H          '.    :
..............|XXXHHHHHH$$HHH$H:::..   .':HHHHH$H$n--.   .---'     `.__.--.
..............|XXXXHHHHHHHHH$HH:::::~~~ :HHHHHHHHHHHn :  :                 :
..............|XHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH:::    :HHHHHHHHHHHHHHn   -.___.-.___..DrS.'


    THE VEX FILES  #1                    /-_-/-  \
        _                               ///--_-\\\\
       /-\.-.                           |// " \\\\|
      //=" \\\                          \/__ __\///
     /=/_  _\=                           \-/ /- |/
    //| ,  ,/=              .---.  ) )   // /   .)
   / /C   \ \ \       ( (  /_  _ \      |(__)\ /|
   |  |   "  | |           \\></ /      |_---'__/
   \\_\\_ ^ ///             \"  /      _/ \--'/ \__
    ___/ \-/\___         ___/\~/\___  / | // /\ |  \
   /    \/\\/   \           \    \   /  |/|| \_\|  |
   \  \_  \\   \ \           \_/_/\ /  / ||| _\  | |
    \ ==\-._..-| |           / |\  /  /|/ ||  \\ | |
     \  """_.--" /         _/ _| \   / || \/    \| |
     /`--""\"---"                 `-'  ||=======|/ |
    / /_/  /\ \\                       |\  .   /\_/
    \_____/  \__\                      |/| |_  \_/|
     \        /                        |:|  |   |\|
     /________\                        |:|  |   |:|
        \ ) )                          |:|  |   |:|
        / |/                           |:|  |   |:|
       .\ |                            |:|  |   |:|
      /\/_|                             "|__|___|"
     /_ |  \_                           _.' |' |
       \_\\__\                         (___(___)

  Mouldy fails to impress Scurvy with his new evidence
         _..._                                 ___ ___
      _."     "._      THE VEX FILES  #2      /-_-/-  \
   .-"/         \"-.                         ///--_-\\\\
 ."   -.__   __.-   ".                       |// " \\\\|
 \       /"""\       /                       \/____ \///
 \"-._  /\___/\  _..--.                       /-) -  |/
  "-._""-/___\-""_/    \    .---.             \/    /.)
  _/  ""-\___/-"" \    /   / _  _\            (_)    |__
         /___\     \ _/o o \ \><// o           \--'__| /
         \___/   o  / \\  \ \  "/ /        .---`-'.__./\
            ___   \/\  \   \/\o/\/       .'/"\_/""      \
           /   \     \_/    \   /      .'__| /           |
          /   \ \    / \_    \_/     .'/ /  /   /   |    |
      ___/__n__\/   _\   `   / \    c-+----'   /    |   / \
     / /  / *:              _\  \_  E_|____   /\   ___ /--'
    o  \_/) ::#  ..                  \\\\  """         \ /
       | \o :%4*:.                    \\ \              |
      _/ /_``:%:'.                     |\  \          / |
                                       | /             /
                                       \  /      |   \ \
    Mouldy reveals the real            /  _____   ____  \ DrS.
    reason for the long               `--"\  \ """\  \"-'
    raincoats.                             \  \   _\  \
                                        .__/--|  ( `--|
                                       (___.__|   `|__|
                      (   (            )  )   _____ ____
THE VEX FILES  #3      \_               _/   ///=- \-=- \  .------------.
         ___           ( "--         --" )  ///|==\//=\\ \ | It must be |
        /---\\--.       ( (      )    ) )   ||//==\//=\\\\\| demonic    |
       // /==\/-\\      \_     (       _/   \\\/     \\\|||| posession. |
      ///=/     \ \     ( "--    )  --" )    \/ _  __ \///|`-. .--------'
     |_/=/ ._  _.\=      ( (   )     ) )      \"\  /"-.\|//  |/
     / /=   ." . /=\     \_   (  (    _/      /`/ /`   ||/   '
    / / /     \  \\ \    ( "   (  )  " )     / /       .)
   | /|(.     "   || |    )(  ))) )) )(      |(__.)\  /|
   \  \\|    /-\  |/ /  __\ (()(((()( /__  _ |  ___,   |  _
    \\_\\\_  `-' /_//  |.-'   """"""  `-.| \"-\  - ____/-"/
     "   /\`\___/|/\   ||   -._ .-.     ||__\|/`---' /\| /____
   _..--'\ \  .  / /--.||   -._| | |    ||   \\ \ _ / ///     "\
  /       \_\---/   *. ||   -._|"|"|    || .*  \_/ \_///__      |
 |        \  \ /      .||   -._|.-.|    ||.      \_/ /   /      |
 |   |     \  /    *.  ||_______________||  .*   / \|   /   Y   |
            \    *.  . /.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-_\ .     | ||  /    |   |
   DrS.             . /.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-._\\ .*        /         |
                  *. /.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.\ .*
             ( (    /_____/___________\___o_\    ) )
                    \_______________________/

               Scurvy suspects a more mundane reason
               for the self-destruction of her laptop.


                                                  ___ ___
                                (             )  /-_-/-  \
  THE VEX FILES  #4                 _  _        ///--_-\\\\ .---------.
                                 ) /--/-\     ( |// " \\\\| | Woah... |
                                  /// "=\\      \/-' `-\/// | Look at `--.
                                 (=/_,._\=\    ) \^/ /^ |/  | the little |
                                 )=\_  _ |\\  (  // /   .)  | grey dude  |
                                 / / /   )\ \  )|(__)\ /| ._| go!! .-----'
                    .--------.  | (  "   |  |  *====\\__/ `--------'
                    | Tshyaa |   \*==\\_//_//  _/`- c \ \_
                    | right. |_.  _/\c \-__   / | // \/\| "\
                    `----------' / \//\/\  "\ | |/|| \  \  |
                                //  \\ \ \/ / || ||| _\  \ |
                               / \_. \\_\  /  ||/ ||  \\  '|
                               \ \\  //  \//  ||| \/    \__/
            .---.               \_/  /     \  ||\=======| |
  .---.    /_  _ \       .---.  /// /\  \_\ \ /|/| .   \|-|
 / _  _\   \\></ /      /_  _ \ /__/_ \_____/ \|:| |_   | |
 \ \><//   \\"  //      \\></ /   \        /   |:|  |   |\|
  \  "/     \\7//        \"  /    /________\   |:|  |   |:|
  _\^/       /  \         \^/_      (_(_ /     |:|  |   |:|
 //  \\_     \__/       _//  \\      | | )     |:|  |   |:|
  \__/  \     \_\__    /  \__/       | | / DrS  "|__|___|"
   \ \   ".          ."    / \      _/_/-|      _.' |' |
   /_/_    "--....--"     _\ /_    /_/__/|     (___(___)



 THE VEX FILES  #5             .-"""-.__.-"""-..__..-"""-.__.-"""-.
                              /                _  _                \
                             /                /-\/-\                \
                            (                /// "=\\                )
                          _  \              /=/_  _\=\              /
                         (_)  )             )=\. '. |\\            (
                      _      /              / / /   )\ \            \
                     (_)    (         _..--| | ___  |  |-.._         )
                   _         \      ."  _.-"\\\`-'_//_//._  ".      /
      ____ ____   (_)         )     `._ ""-..__\-'/__..-"" _.'     (
     //=- \-=-  \            /         "-._   -.  .-   _.-"         \
    ////=\\/==\\ \          (     .--.  ___\\        //__   .--.     )
   //|//=\\/==\\||           \   '""\ \/o_o\/  .__.  \/ o\_/o/""`   /
   ||||//     \///            )      \o_/ \_o_/"__"\__o/\_o_/      (
   |\\\/  _  _ \/            /   .--.   ____/  "__"  \___    .--.   \
    \|/.-"\  /"/            (   '""\o\_/o__o_/ "__" \_o_o\__/ /""`   )
     ||  --\ \-\             \      \_o_/  \          / \_o_o/      /
     (.       \ \             \                               DrS  /
      |    (.__)|              "-.___.-""-.__.-"""-.__.-""-.____.-"
    _ |  /.___  | _
    \"-\___ - _/-"/        Mouldy likes to fantasise about Scurvy naked.
   __\ |/\`---'\|/___
        \ \__/ /

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Sogno di una notte di mezzo inverno

Stanotte ho sognato una storia così ingarbugliata che devo raccontarla. E pensando a dove farlo, mi son detto che è meglio nel mio personalissimo sito web, piuttosto che su un blog gestito da altri.
Insomma, per venire al dunque, la parte della storia che ricordo è solo l’ultimissimo segmento, lasciando spazio per chissà quali rocambolesche avventure nel lungo prologo.

[…] e quindi entro, tramite una porta scorrevole in stile Doom II, in un enorme stanzone nel quale campeggia un cannone automatico a quadruplo laser azzurro, che subito dopo aver rilevato la mia presenza fa per girarsi verso di me. Ormai preparato all’impreparabile, mi tuffo di corsa dietro di esso e corro oltre, evitando la vaporizzazione. Assieme a me, mi accorgo, c’è un compagno di viaggio così importuno che sembra Richard Cunningham di Happy Days. Ci arrampichiamo assieme su una altissima pittaforma metallica che si trova nello stanzone, sullo stesso lato del cannone automatico a quadruplo laser azzurro, ma molto più distante dall’ingresso. Stranamente il cannone ci ignora durante questa manovra. Le scale metalliche che portano alla piattaforma metallica sono zigzaganti ma oltremodo ripide, e ci cruogioliamo una volta in cima beatamente sdraiati a recuperare fiato. Da quella altezza mi rendo conto che in realtà lo stanzone è una specie di hangar, un cui lato è completamente aperto all’esteno (e qui mi chiedo, ma per quale motivo non me ne sono accorto prima), e triste realtà delle tristi realtà, si apre, lateralmente, su un campo di battaglia dalla forma di un largo corridoio (dall’altro lato del corridoio ci sono edifici non ben specificati l’accesso ai quali è non ben specificato). In questo largo corridoio si affrontano successive ondate di truppe; quelle "amiche" indossano tutte una maglietta aderente verde militare che lascia trasparire torsi robustie muscolosi, un passamontagna nero, pantaloni mimetici militari, e anfibi. Praticamente sembrano i terroristi di Counterstrike. Suppongo di averli identificati come "amici" perché gli altri sono molto peggio: infatti noto subito schierati dalla parte opposta dei grossi carri robotizzati aracnidiformi, di quelli che vengono dipinti nel futuro cibernetico di Ghost in the Shell – Stand Alone Complex, ma (magari fa tendenza) sono completamente pitturati in stile mimetico militare, e sono dotati di batterie di missili a tracciamento termico (ovviamente); dalla loro parte, ci sono anche vaste truppe che sembrano composte dai soldati imperiali in uniforme bianca di Star Wars.
Spaventato da tutto ciò, ma rendendomi anche conto che quei poveretti dei miei "alleati" sono in inferiorità tattica e numerica, decido di far qualcosa; ed è qui che mi dico "ma sono dentro Half Life 2!"… infatti, con mia sorpresa, mi scopro a trasportare 5 granate, ed esattamente 5, che sembrano barattoli di pelati da 250gr con il manico, solo che sono colorati di verde scuro. Insomma, prendo bene la mira, tenendo in considerazione la velocità di avanzamento dei carri robotizzati, e la distanza che la granata stessa deve percorrere; le prime due granate finiscono per accucciarsi sotto la pancia dei suddetti carri robotizzati, subito dopo aver mostrato la loro scia luminosa rossa per indicare "attenti, stiamo per esplodere, allontanatevi", granate altruiste. E’ quando sento la voce robotica dei soldati imperiali in uniforme bianca dire "move out!" che decido definitivamente di trovarmi in qualche strano mod per Half Life 2. Insomma, le prime due granate esplodono sotto i carri, ma senza atterrarli; in compenso però feriscono gravemente, spazzandolo via, qualche soldato alleato.
Finalmente appare il succo della forza nemica, ovvero una ondata di soldati che hanno l’esatto aspetto degli alieni nel film "Alien"; gongolando di eccitazione, lancio una granata in mezzo al gruppo, e questa esplodendo coinvolge un Alien ed un altro nemico, che potrebbe sembrare un soldato imperiale in uniforme bianca… solo che è nero. Forse è stato annerito dall’esplosione, mah. Comunque i due vengono proiettati dall’esplosione in un lungo volo orizzontale radente il suolo, facendo zig-zag tra gli altri Alien marcianti. Gaudente della scena, mi libero in un esultante grido, ed assieme a me anche Richard Cunningham, proprio come fanno i ribelli di Half Life 2 dopo aver abbattuto uno Strider o una Gunchip dei Combine: nel mio caso invece si trattava di due unità in un esercito ancora nutrito, ed il grido, naturalmente, non fa altro che attirarmi contro l’attenzione dell’intero campo di battaglia, carri robotizzati aracnidiformi compresi, che puntano verso la mia piattaforma metallica raggiunta da scale metalliche le batterie di missili. Io e Richard Cunningham scendiamo di corsa le scale… io per primo; credendolo un rifugio sicuro corro dietro il cannone automatico a quadruplo laser azzurro, ma con mia sorpresa, pur credendo che il campo di mira fosse di soli 180°, mi rendo conto che lo stesso cannone è in grado di girare su se stesso per 360° quando i suoi fasci collimati iniziano ad avvicinarsi alla mia spalla sinistra, quindi mi rotolo sotto di essi, corro verso l’apertura dell’hangar con il cannone che mi insegue nel suo campo visivo, e finalmente mi butto all’esterno.
Già, mi butto all’esterno.
Esattamente in mezzo al campo di battaglia, ai carri robotizzati aracnidiformi, ai soldati imperiali in uniforme bianca che probabilmente si annerisce una volta investita dall’esplosione di una granata a forma di barattolo di pelati da 250gr col manico e di colore verde scuro, e assieme alle truppe di Alien. E ciò che è peggio, Richard Cunningham non è più con me, e non so che fine abbia fatto, siccome non lo vedo più neanche nell’hangar. E lì mi accorgo che i numeri rossi in basso a destra nel mio campo visivo, e che si suppone indichino le mie statistiche vitali, sono a zero per la tuta HEV, e ad un livello inferiore a 10 per i punti salute. La prima cosa che mi dico è: "Da quando in qua è cambiato il layout dell’HUD di Half Life 2?" e immediatamente dopo "Come mai sono quasi morto?"; la prima domanda non trova risposta, mentre per la seconda decido di convincermi che sono stato colpito alle spalle dal fascio laser quadruplo del cannone automatico a laser quadruplo azzurro, e non me ne sono accorto, appunto perché si tratta di un sogno. Sfuggendo oltre nel campo di battaglia, inoltrandomi nelle forze alleate in cerca di medkit, mi accorgo invece che c’è una vera e propria stazione di ricarica. Ora, si tratta di un sogno, quindi la stazione di ricarica non è esattamente come quelle ex-combine sparse nel mondo di Half Life 2, ma più esattamente somiglia ad una vecchia pompa di benzina, di metallo semi-arrugginito e coperta da una vernice biancasta che si sta spellando. Da questa pompa di benzina semiarrugginita e biancastra si diparte un tubicino di gomma con un aggancio terminale che ricorda in miniatura il bocchettone di una pompa GPL. Suppongo che l’affare vada agganciato da qualche parte nella mia HEV suite, ma solo a quel punto mi rendo conto di non indossare nessuna tuta HEV, e con la più totale naturalezza mi infilo il piccolo bocchettone nell’ombelico. Le mie statistiche vitali vengono ora visualizzate sul pannello della pompa di benzina semiarrugginita e biancasra, e noto che per primo aumenta il valore di carica della HEV suite che non indosso, fino ad oltre 100 (penso subito all’ultimo livello di Half Life 2), ma presto assume un valore numerico random di 5 cifre; successivamente la stessa cosa accade per il valore degli health points. Ben venga, mi dico.
Appena di stacco dall’ombelico il tubo di gomma, si fa vivo il presentimento di essere in un pericolo immediato: infatti in lontananza vedo un colosso che sembra The Rock de La Mummia, ma che porta con sé una enorme clava… molto più pericoloso quindi. Inizio a fuggire correndo per quello che sembra il sentiero sterrato di una grande piantagione
, e mentre fuggo, mi accorgo che non sono Gordon Freeman, ma Motoko di Ghost in the Shell – Stand Alone Complex. Cerco di seminare per quanto possibile il mio inseguitore, senza nessun vantaggio, nonostante il mio corpo cibernetico superpompato mostri più agilità dei suoi arti massicci che si spostano lentamente l’uno davanti all’altro. Questo, durante la fuga, mi fa pensare alla scena dell’inseguimento in Gone in 60 seconds, ma quello originale del 1974, non il remake, dove per quanto Maindrian, nella Ford Mustang, si destreggi in abili manovre, si ritrova sempre le volanti della polizia col fiato sul suo collo. Insomma, ironia della sorte, alla fine di questa piantagione trovo un’altra piattaforma metallica raggiunta da ripide e zigzaganti scale metalliche, evidentemente vanno di moda in questo mondo onirico. Intraprendo più in fretta che posso la scalata, stavolta senza Richard Cunningham, e mi acquatto sulla piattaforma metallica raggiunta da zigzaganti e ripide scale metalliche, ma The Rock è non solo in grado di salire a sua volta, bensì lo fa ad una ragguardevole velocità. Io mi precipito in basso, e qui non ricordo se scivolando giù per le scale in stile Price Of Persia I due troni, sul lato delle scale metalliche opposto a quello per cui sta salendo The Rock, oppure se avvantanggiandomi del mio corpo cibertnetico superpompato mi tuffo in un salto a volo d’angelo atterrando alla velocità di 36 metri al secondo. Quello che ricordo è che mi getto in una pazza fuga tornando per dove me ne ero venuto, ma non prima di notare che, alla mia sinistra, giù per una depressione che sembra vulcanica, c’è un piccolo lago semicoperto da alghe e fronde di alberi, nel quale stanno nuotando due o più persone; combatto la voglia di gettarmi anche io per un bagno, e proseguo nella fuga.
Stranamente, ma è pur sempre un sogno, mi trovo tra i filari della vigna vicino la mia casa nella vita reale, e non in mezzo al campo di battaglia che si trovava proprio nella direzione verso la quale stavo correndo. Si tratta di un terreno morbido, perché regolarmente arato da un trattore, e in pendenza. Io mi getto in preda al panico tra i fili metallici con acrobazie che sembrano quelle di Catherine Zeta-Jones in Entrampment, ma in fast-forward, mentre The Rock inesorabile procede travolgendo tutto ciò che si trova nel suo percorso. Alla fine giungo al termine della vigna, e non so come, ma io e The Rock ci concediamo una tregua ed iniziamo a chiacchierare amichevolmente del più e del meno, comodamente stesi a terra. Da vicino The Rock non sembra in realtà The Rock: è brutto quanto la fame, e inverosimilmente grasso, i suoi rotoli di lardo ricoperti di peluria riccia fuoriescono avvicendandosi da sopra la cintola; è a questo punto che si fa avanti e si dichiara nei miei confronti in maniera piuttosto esplicita… in fondo sono sempre Motoko. Io rifiuto in maniera decisa, ma gentilmente, per non farlo alterare, siccome per quanto brutto e grasso, è sempre grosso abbastanza da provocarmi notevoli danni fisici, soprattutto ad una distanza dalla quale non avrei tempo per sfuggirgli; sul suo volto si dipinge una espressione di profonda delusione.
E’ in quel momento che dall’ingresso stradale della vigna giunge un piccolo camion dal quale scendono un signore di mezza età magro e coi baffetti, che sembra Marrabbio, il papà di Licia, quella di Kiss me Licia, e una giovane ragazzetta, che sulle prime penso essere sua figlia (no, non sembrava Licia nel sogno… ma ora, ripensandoci…) ma mi confessa semplicemente essere una sua impiegata, la quale subito dopo scherza sul fatto che Marrabbio ci provi costantemente con lei. I due parlano con qualche personaggio esterno a quelli già elencati, e che non mi sono premurato di idenitificare, forse era un Alien che aveva ordinato pizze per tutto l’esercito nemico, forse era qualcun altro. La versione brutta e grassa di The Rock è misteriosamente scomparsa, forse umiliata dal mio rifiuto, ed io mi metto a giocherellare con un traino motorizzato installato sul camion, la corda del quale era avvolta in maniera piuttosto disordinata, quindi svolgo il tutto e lo riavvolgo correttamente, Marrabbio ringrazia, parlaimo del più e del meno, e di come oggi come oggi è difficile tenere in ordine le corde dei traini meccanini dei camion… poi il sogno si fa sfumato, e suona la sveglia del mio cellulare.

Amen.

I migliori approcci sulla chat C6 di Atlantide

Da qualche tempo ho fatto tornare in auge uno stupendo strumento di comunicazione: C6 di Atlantide! Certo, Atlantide è stata assorbita da Virgilio, ma il nome rimane.
Come uso io C6? Lascio il client attivo in background, così come faccio già da molto tempo con Miranda (“emulatore” ICQ e MSN); se poi qualcuno mi chiama, magari ci scappa la chiacchierata. Ho soprattutto apprezzato la funzione di “away” automatico, dopo un periodo di inattività pre-impostabile, che prima era assente, e che quindi mi faceva apparire virtualmente come sempre attivo anche quando non al PC.
Tuttavia ciò che è realmente importante non è il “come io, ephestione, uso C6”, bensì come usa C6 la maggior parte degli utenti… ed è per questo nobile scopo che mi sono avvalso del prezioso aiuto di una mia amica, la quale si è prestata giocosamente al progetto.
Ciò che alla mia amica (una ragazza attraente e di sani principi, secondo il giudizio del sottoscritto – giudizio ovviamente opinabile) è stato richiesto di fare, è semplicemente il collegarsi, ed impostare il proprio stato come “disponibile”, lasciando che il client ricevesse tutti i messaggi in entrata, e rigorosamente evitando ogni replica a ciò che le veniva scritto (tra l’altro simulando comunque il comportamento più frequente da parte delle utenti di sesso femminile, solitamente subissate di chiamate). Il contenuto di ogni finestra veniva poi riportato (copia/incolla) in un file di testo, ed ogni intervento veniva numerato sequenzialmente. La prima sessione, di seguito riportata, è rappresentativa di un totale di 100 interventi, ed è stata raccolta nell’intervallo approssimativo di un’ora e mezza. Da notare che nei primissimi minuti la velocità approssimativa, stimata dalla mia amica, si è attestata sulle 10 nuove finestre al minuto.
Alcuni interventi (tra cui uno particolarmente sostanzioso, a detta della mia amica) non sono stati inclusi, per un problema da lei riscontrato nella procedura di copia/incolla; in altri casi, la velocità nel susseguirsi delle finestre era tale che, nel tentativo di chiudere una discussione appena copiata, ne veniva chiusa una nuova appena aperta, comparsa pochi istanti prima che venisse premuto il pulsante [X], e quindi sovrappostasi alla precedente.

Seguono i risultati, ovvero l’elenco degli “approcci”, inalterato, se non nella rimozione dei rinvii di linea (sostituiti da “/”), e dalla blanda censura delle parole più pesanti, nonché ovviamente dall’oscuramento di dati personali sensibili (riconoscibile dai @@@).
Conclusioni e discussione dei risultati sono rimandati al lettore.

01) ciao/ti va di vederlo in cam
02) smak
03) fammela vedere in kam
04) altezza: 180 occhi: Verdi capelli: Neri fisico: Atletico .........ma fai anche corsi accelerati di free climbing si? ;-) / ..............altrimenti l'1.80 è raggiungibile da pochi.......... :-O / temo che da lassù tu non mi senta...........vabbè...........prima o poi troverò una piccozza...........buon proseguimento.......
05) ciao
06) ciao
07) ciao
08) ciao / come va? / io ho 22 anni,tu=?
09) ciao sono <nome> di <città> per caso ci conosciamo?(vedi la foto) / in seguito ad 1 malattia ho bisogno di fare sesso ogni 24 ore, puoi aiutarmi tu? (vedi foto)
10) hai mai fatto l'amore al cinema?
11) ciao / io sono <nome> 22 anni da <città> / tu<?
12) ciao
13) ciaoooo
14) CIAO / <mionick> / SCUSAMI / CERCO RAGAZZA DE <città> OK TE / SI TE / X SESSO NO / OK / X AMICIZIA OK / X PARLARE OK / ORA / CHIAMI TU O IO / IL NUMER / TI POSSO CHIAMARE / OK CIAO / SCUSAMI / MUORI COSA INUTILE NON RISPONDI UNA IN M,ENO
15) ciao
16) ciao
17) hai tempo per parlare con me?
18) ciao
19) ciso
20) buona sera
21) ti va di scopare cn un bel negrone molto dotato? / ti va di scopare cn un bel negrone molto dotato?
22) ciao / hai la cam?
23) ciao ti va di vedere un bel ragazo in web cam? anche se tu non c'el' hai
24) amore
25) ciao
26) ciao,vorrei sapere se gradisci fare i p@mp@n@
27) ciao, buona seraaaaa
28) ciao
29) ciao
30) permesso...... :D
31) CIAO SEI IMPEGNATA??? CHATTIAMO???
32) ciao, posso farti una domanda?
33) ciao
34) ciao / :D
35) ciao
36) ciao <nick> sei di rom,a
37) ciaoo!
38) aiutami..ho trovato mia mamma che...
39) c6 / c6 / impegnata?
40) ciao vorresti vederlo in cam?
41) ciao
42) ciao / vuoi vedere il mio grosso ca@@o in cam ?
43) ciao
44) ciaaaaaaaaaa
45) ciao...interessa vedermi in cam.....?
46) CIAO SONO PIGI,ADORO ESSERE COMANDATO, DA UNA DONNA.SE TI VA PUOI FARLO HO CAM, SE HAI MSN MESSENGER MGLIO,PERCHE' SI VEDE BENE LA CAM IL MIO INDIRIZZO è @@@@@@hotmail.com AGGIUNGIMI CHIAMAMI E CI DIVERTIAMO.GRAZIE CIAO
47) t va parlar d porkate?
48) scusi..qui è il pronto soccorso
49) ciao
50) HO VOGLIA VIENI IN CAM?
51) ciao
52) ciao
53) ciao
54) ciao
55) ciao...ti disturbo?
56) ciao / sei bsx
57) cam? / cam?
58) ti invita ad entrare nella stanza cerco donna curiosa con la cam:
59) ci divertiamo....?
60) ciao! vuoi vedermi nudo con la webcam?
61) ciao
62) ciao princpessa / sono <nome> di <cttà> / come va??
63) ciao
64) ciao / piacere <nome>
65) hola non mi dire che disturbo?????
66) ciao :)
67) ciao / sei di <città>?
68) ciao posso una domanda?
69) bella ale' / come stai tutto apposto? / scusa ma che e' l'esoterismo? / nn ricordo / tipo satanismo / o erotismo? / o tutt'eddue / e / e / e / e / e / s / t / r / o / n / z / o / n / a
70) ciao
71) ciao / cmva?
72) ciaoooooooooooooo / :)
73) ciao bellessima
74) toc toc
75) ciao che fai di bello stasera? Mi dai qualche suggerimento? :(
76) TI VUOI METTERE CON ME?
77) ciao,piacere <nome> / troppo impegnata o non ti piacciono ragazzi di colore?
78) ciao
79) ciao / io mi kiamo <nome> piacer / ti vadi chattar unpo kon me ;) :)
80) ciao
81) ciao
82) ciao
83) ciao vorresti vederlo in cam?
84) ciao, molto sfidante il tuo profilo... mi piace. ma non so se sei razzista nei confronti degli uomini sposati... ;)
85) ciao bellissima
86) OLA CIAO <nome> IMMAGINO, MI HA COLPITO IL NIKNAME ,CARINO CMQ SE TI VA .MI CHAIMO <nome>
87) ciao.... / tu 6 di <città>?io sono qui da 3 gg xchè frequento una scuola x danza,musica e teatro a <luogo> ma non conosco ancora nessuno.....
88) ciao
89) ciao
90) hai presente quel film dove la sorellina mastruba il fratello ?
91) ciao / tr@ia
92) ciao disturbo?
93) ciao / da dove dgt?
94) CIAO
95) ciao piacere <nome> 30 anni da <città>; se vuoi chattare con me (ho anche la cam) il mio nick su msn è @@@@@@@virgilio.it
96) ciao / sono <nome> piacere
97) ciao
98) Ciao dolce angelo ti andrebbero coccole
99) ciao
100)CIAO.. / CI 6??

Continua l’esperimento, stavolta in un contesto leggermente diverso: stessa amica e stesso profilo, le è stato tuttavia richiesto di impostare il suo stato su “Solo amici”. Sono stati quindi registrati gli interventi in Segreteria, in un lasso, deciso come standard, di un’ora e mezza. Parte di questo intervallo è stata eseguita in stato di “Assente”, in quanto la mia amica si è allontanata dal PC per un po’.
Riporto di seguito il copia/incolla dei messaggi lasciati in segreteria, dopo aver rimosso i nick, e applicato la solita censura dove opportuno. Un solo commento: lo stato di non disponibilità appare (ovviamente) ridurre il numero di interventi altrui, è palese come il numero di persone sia stato decisamente esiguo se paragonato a quello dell’esempio precedente. In alcuni casi, la stessa persona ha inviato più volte lo stesso messaggio.

01) CIAO, BUONPOMERIGGIO e BUONADOMENICA, posso o ti disturbo??? spero di non disturbarti!!!Mi farebbe molto piacere poter scambiare 4 chiacchere con te in tranquillita', che ne diresti.......TI ANDREBBE??? ;-)
02) CIAO, BUONPOMERIGGIO e BUONADOMENICA, posso o ti disturbo??? spero di non disturbarti!!!Mi farebbe molto piacere poter scambiare 4 chiacchere con te in tranquillita', che ne diresti.......TI ANDREBBE??? ;-)
03) CIAO, BUONPOMERIGGIO e BUONADOMENICA, posso o ti disturbo??? spero di non disturbarti!!!Mi farebbe molto piacere poter scambiare 4 chiacchere con te in tranquillita', che ne diresti.......TI ANDREBBE??? ;-)
04) ci fidanziamo?
05) ciao...
06) pago per un p@@@ino
07) ciaociao piccolina
08) CIAO! SONO NUDO DAVANTI ALLA CAM CON IL PENE IN MANO E HO TANTA VOGLIA DI SB@@@ARE! TI VA DI ATTIVARE CON ME??? SI O NO???
09) CIAO! SONO NUDO DAVANTI ALLA CAM CON IL PENE IN MANO E HO TANTA VOGLIA DI SB@@@ARE! TI VA DI ATTIVARE CON ME??? SI O NO???
10) CIAO! SONO NUDO DAVANTI ALLA CAM CON IL PENE IN MANO E HO TANTA VOGLIA DI SB@@@ARE! TI VA DI ATTIVARE CON ME??? SI O NO???
11) CIAO! SONO NUDO DAVANTI ALLA CAM CON IL PENE IN MANO E HO TANTA VOGLIA DI SB@@@ARE! TI VA DI ATTIVARE CON ME??? SI O NO???
12) Ciao
13) salve... (posso?).... ing 40enne ..... mi intrigherebbe trovare qui occasione per avventura vera, simpatica e piccante......... guarda sul profilo per vedere se potessi piacerti.... e fatti viva se ti va..
14) ciao
15) ciao, sarei felice di fare conversazione con te, ti va?
16) ciao
17) CIAO, BUONPOMERIGGIO e BUONADOMENICA, posso o ti disturbo??? spero di non disturbarti!!!Mi farebbe molto piacere poter scambiare 4 chiacchere con te in tranquillita', che ne diresti.......TI ANDREBBE??? ;-)
18) ciao

Credo che ora immaginiate il motivo per cui quando cercate di attaccar discorso con una qualunque ragazza su C6 non vi arriva quasi mai risposta.

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